CHAGRIN SMILES

Lips rage passions
senses tingling with torment.

Words regurgitate
zephyr ire
paranoia's eloquence
firing missiles.

Hitting target
exquisite devastation.

Mushroom cloud ruination
discovering wounded,
enemies wearing love
assumed to be deceit's armor.

Face carved in scarlet,
veiling pressing buttons.

AT PEACE

When the winds of trial blow to fierce then we often truly have more reason to crave for something to quiet the chaos. It isn't always easy and we don't always find the perfect solution, but we till truly cherish when it happens to our favor.

I have known so many people who have never found any peace. You can see it in their eyes, that haunting sense of inner to turmoil and anguish that never flees.

Through it all the heart remembers. Sometimes with joy, other with tears, but it still remembers.

Where does peace truly come in such situations? Can we unearth the grave where we buried our smiles?

For some this is a much more difficult task than others. It is the journey that requires one to move past the need for only seeing the emptiness.

What contributes to the oasis we find? Is that a location where it will thrive the most? Only each soul can answer that question.

For me peace comes through creativity. The times I let God's spirit flow through me in thoughts that take me out of my tempest notions.

It is a fragile climate, one easily shredded by the smallest incidents. And people can often be the host for more aggravation.

This is all part of the awareness one is challenged to embrace. And it truly only endures with God's help.

For through his leading we can rise above any clamor. Knowing how in this life it doesn't happen constantly.

Which makes being grateful for the times it work all the better. And that is what makes the peace even more valuable.

I've touched this plain of quiet at times, but never as intensely as when I left it in God's hands. For he guides as his truly satisfying in ways that we all can find some hope.

Will it happen the same for everyone? Not at all. What glows as tranquil in one life will not dent the need of another.

But being open to listening will truly make the difference. And that is the key. Spend more time in listening to God than doing all the talking.

Funny how fast we learn when we stop trying to impress with our own tongues. A simple lesson that can last forever.

WORTHY

I always thought this was an interesting word. For who truly defines the worth of anything?

How often we can find ourselves in the place where our value is subject to opinion. We can have enemies that hate us and will naturally see us as worthless.

What is even sadder is when our family takes on the role. For they seem to have the power to truly harm the most in that regard.

I can say that is a good thing, merely that it does happens. The hard part to me is arriving at some point of real honesty in terms of one's worth.

It can be such a challenge to find a balance and real view that isn't distorted in some way. One's self esteem can be so easily bruised in the process. And we have so many ways we often respond to that issue.

Some fall into a hole. A very dark abyss where one can not see or feel any light. Just the long pauses between sobs. Self pity consumes and one never truly feels any hope for their is only darkness.

Then there is the other extreme. Where one lives in the clouds and is always above it all. No problem ever will force gravity to burden the life. It will always feel so full of hope and yet never bothers with reality.

Both extremes never truly result in some kind of real clarity of one's worth. It all becomes so artificial. At least those consumed with the light know they are looking for things to improve, which still feels good compared to being depressed all the time.

God in his mercy will always let us have free will. He won't zap us with the need to be think we can conquer the world or decide to end it all.

What his spirit will do is empower when we are feeling down and calm when we are feeling too full of pride. All for the purpose of helping us to enabling us to function in a more healthy frame of mind.

In order to be sure we are able to function without the inner voices overwhelming. That journey so need in life where we travel by truth and not by deception.

And along the way we find the mirror of his revelation. The one that tells what is our real worth.

In God's eyes we all have value. And I know it must grief him to see when we don't honor his creation.

But for those who turn to him, he will grant us joy to see in ways that gives hope.

TINCTURED

Cerebral archive palette
borrowing reality's edges
from philosophic
nomad sages.

Stuffing the world
into prejudice's trash compactor,
squeezing it of any life
that doesn't bleed
with night or day's clarity.

Burying in a cemetery
whatever mutates
into enigma gray.

Stalking noon
for salvation
from shadows.

Closing eyes
when sky turns leaden
with storms of hypocrisy.

WORN

It is sad at times how easy life is to feel exhausted. But then it does remind we are mortal. And that is what is supposed to be a good thing.

If we never felt any aches and pains I'm sure we would not have the same sense of being other than immortal. Which gives some sense to the aging process.

Still we do not always relish our wrinkles and lost of energy. It might not cleave to us with sunshine, but rather bring us certain shadows.

What we don't have to do is treat the shadows as death shrouds. One can embrace the process of change without the need to see it only as darkness.

It is an easy problem to have run through our lives. How often pride can intrude upon our view.

I've known so many who never allowed such transitions of life to be accepted with the needed reality. And that can be such a challenge at times.

For the soul truly see life through eternal eyes. Our spirit has the same youthful sense of time it always has.

This infects our thoughts and motives. We might feel older, but it can still bury us with illusions tales.

Which is where we think we can do everything the same as when we were a teenager. It is a nice illusion, but not realistic.

So in the process we can either learn to trust God more or we can remain stubborn and stiff necked to our circumstances. This never leads to happiness.

Lots of complaints, but never happiness. For one can not truly savor the present if you are not content.

And many times if one basis contentment on a certain expectation in terms of living, well then it would be hard to be happy. And the lord might use such situations to try and teach.

But it doesn't mean we will listen. Which can only make thing worse when we fail to do as would truly benefit us.

Life is not the whole that we are. It is the journey we travel on our way to eternity. However some will not travel it as God would guide. They will stumble and resist and in the end, gain nothing.

Should age truly kill our spirit? That is a question each of us has to ask for ourselves.

SADNESS

SADNESS

How this can be on the human heart. To be under the heavy burden of feeling so depressed with the feeling thing will never get better.

What is hard at times is coping with people who think it is sin to be sad. I never felt there was anything wrong with being honest with one's feelings.

I do feel there is a sadness in dishonesty or denial. Those never bring a joy in the long run. And God is never honored in the process.

So we can stand on the threshold of our reality and devour the sunrise with our eyes close so as to not be blinded by the truth. That is the option some prefer.

Somewhere one needs a balance. And that is hard at times to find. Which doesn't mean we should try to stop looking.

I have seen this too many times. There are some who simply use any reason to be unhappy.

You can talked to them after they win the lottery and they will be complaining about something. There is a difference between grief, real grief and always seeing the down side of life.

Which never truly helps anything How can one rise above the storm of sadness if one never comes inside?

You can stand in the rain all day and complain about it, but it will not improve life. Nor will you feel better about it.

I have found myself staying in the valley at times. You can always find those to keep you there.

You may even learn to enjoy the misery. And if it draws attention to yourself even more so.

But that will never bring any balance. Just a lop side view of life that never helps one mature.

God is not the author of such views. His spirit doesn't inspire us to stay in such sad states of mind.

It does not help nor guarantee change. But at least if we listen we will learn and find the times when we should have reason to smile.

That is the blessing which move us beyond a sigh and a frown and makes life more chersihed.

TINDER BOXES

Brittle aspirations
dying on withered
desire branches.

Circumstance's hellish breath
bending heart's pulse
into stagnant streams
while the arid passions
once fed by anticipation's plasma
crack from lack of sustenance.

Eyes betrothed
of suppression's kindling
never post their warning signs
that it is fire season
for their soul.

Merely waited in docile rage
until a word sparks
what will always burn out of control.

Social fireman wander with limp hoses
pouring out trickles of solutions
upon the heat,
but never truly caring to water the trees
so they don't become an inferno.

ELEPHANTS

Awww, the behemoths rumbling around the mind and causing stampedes in anxiety. The seconds when the whole world seems to be full of pack of marauding incidents where they goal seems to give you a heart attack.

And the more you try to protect yourself the more things seem to get worse. Which only leads to every situation seeming like the end of the world.

It never is, but once it feels like elephants are rumbling then it only gets worse. And then the panic attacks start trumpeting.

My, is that fun. It is with lightning and thunder. With lightning you see the flash and then cringe while waiting for the boom. If it is far away you sit feel unsettled from the waiting.

And if it doesn't come very soon, then it can feel like forever. Finally, when enough time passes you relax.

As for thunder, well that is so much excitement too. You have the joy of letting it rattle through your soul and feel it make you shake if the boom is loud enough

There are so many situations where this sweeps over our lives in ways that disturbs our sense of security. Which for some of us happens way to often.

I always enjoy watching those that like to pretend they never get upset over stress. They work so hard at creating this illusion nothing bothers them.

From my view it is just a matter of people who are more skilled as acting like they are calm. As long as you don't actually expect the truth then it is great.

But if you decide to be honest then it is different. Then you can be human and not some one who is perfect.

Some claim that trusting God would mean never wavering in one's faith. That it means having no doubts ever.

Personally, the one thing I have appreciated is that this is not reality. It sounds good, but is only a myth to many degrees.

And I enjoy the fact that God is merciful and forgives our shortcomings in that regard. if he didn't we would all fall so much farther from his grace.

The challenge is accepting God is not expecting perfection. Then you can at least savor the joy of being saved.

Which is more wonderful when you don't have to lie.

FORGOTTEN

Oh how the memory can torture us. We will remember the things we should forget and not remember the things that we should remember.

Supposedly somewhere in our mind are all our memories. But most of us can't recall every second single. Except perhaps if hypnotized.

Other than that, I think most of us will admit it is hard to remember what we want and then recall it when needed. The more time that passes the more it seems our recollections get fuzzy too.

The only thing that doesn't seem to pass are the thoughts coming from tears. Sometimes the good will be remembered too.

I think such is tied our feelings. If they were intense they get remembered more clearly, but not always.

Along the way, we collect what we wished wasn't as easy to remember. Then beyond this is the problem of forgetting what others have done too.

Again this is a challenge that sweeps over us. Being able to remember the parts that guide in understanding and yet don't kill the spirit.

We can easily get sidetracked on that part. We can move into the place where we get stuck in our own regrets and goo of sorrow.

Such is where we must transverse for the day and move to the place where we can see others without only seeing their knives. That can be hard if we have scars.

They can still hurt even days or years later. Never an easy thing to forget. But learning is the part that matters.

For it is not forgetting all we are that is the goal. It is the need to move along the path of understanding.

To let God help us shine light where we see shadows. Then take us by the hand where we will be able to smile in the midst of the storms.

This is where I have found myself so often and I am happy when the knowledge over powers the tears. It doesn't always work, but sometimes.

When it does, peace often comes. We can relax and feel the joy from those times when we don't only have a reason to be upset.

If the heart can tread in the illumination it does inspire. If we can how often what is forgotten is our identity.

WRITTEN IN THE SAND

Written in the sand

What the heart truly believes
becomes a light to reach into any uncertainty
once one no longer stands on solid ground
but slowly slips on shifting sands
towards circumstance's sea.

It is when risk is a tide
constantly washing over life
we can either see the swells
or by faith trust to their source.

Who is the question
a honest soul truly asks
when the eyes only see
the dangers of drowning.

For with the Lord,
no matter the current
or its perils,
his promises are a safe harbor
and lighthouse
no storm will ever truly
destroy.

The mind that lets the spirit's feet
walk by God's path,
feels his presence down to the toes
regardless where he leads.

Accepting that even if the journeys
beyond the shore of safety
and there dangers of sharks and riptides,
there will be in His arms
the strength given to swim
wherever he leads
seeing with the help of his Holy Spirit
His longsuffering presence
written in the sand.

LONG TIMES

Along the road we find to follow there are never any days where perfection rains on our lives. We must endure the struggle as they come and hope they don't cripple our lives.

Why do we have so much trouble reaching the place to see where life is not perfect for others either. That can be very difficult to always embrace.

But that is part of the journey we all must make. One that we can't stop remembering though some try.

I've been struggling lately in my life with this one particular issue. It involves another person and having to accept all the problems in that person's life.

We are very close, but have totally different lives. There are so many things that separate us.

Only we do have a need to be involved with each other and I have learned to embrace this person despite these differences. Part of it is the Lord's doing.

I have to admit there was a time when this would not have been possible for me. I was not raise in a climate where love and forgiveness were known or practice.

So naturally it would be hard for me to be the epitome of either in the process. I am grateful that the Lord has slowly help to guide me in a way that has made this a part of life I could embrace.

And with this particular person it has stretch my concept of acceptance way passed any point I had experienced before. Still I find myself comfortable with the transition.

Perhaps this is the essence of real spiritual growth in one's spirit. When we can reach beyond ourselves to where we should be.

It can be challenging and difficult, but we must do it at times. We can resist and some do. But in the end we will truly only find peace and know some sense of being blessed if we accept the path chosen for us by the Lord.

This doesn't always come without pain. It doesn't always come without suffering, but when it does come to our lives in ways that helps, the light always heals.

Each time the journey is long it can make us weary. And it can strain us to the point we will can not appreciate where we have yet to grow.

The horizon lying before us that we must reach often includes a few steps where we haven't traveled before. Moving slowly and inhaling what is offered.

Along the way finding what was there all along that we missed in ourselves and others.

LIGHT INNER

Inward gazes are so beneficial when you see more than shadows. When you see more than just a reflection of your own thoughts without the joy of any light.

God helps us with such reflections. Providing we are willing to look with honest eyes. Not everyone embraces that choice.

Satan definitely will help to keep us blind. And no matter how intense the gaze, if you are truly looking for the truth you will find other than what you should be seeing.

There is more to such sight that seeing what you missed before. One can easily get caught up in discovering something profound without understanding it isn't all there is to see.

It is like when we discover a little slice of truth and think we know everything. That can happen so much with Christianity.

How easy it is to start out and learn some fundamental truths and decide you have all the truth there is to know. Which then results in the person simplifying life to the point that they try to make everything as black and white.

Does it work? Well for a while. You can shelter yourself from reality and only see what you want.

Then invent lots of great excuses to make it seem like it works. That can be so easy and seductive, but it never leads to real truth.

Just a prideful form of ignorance. Which never brings about a closer relationship with the Lord.

However, people do this so often. And not necessarily how of decent motives. Pride can get in the way.

All is part of learning. And the inward gaze really can be a blessing when it isn't corrupted by distractions.

Such is the nature of life. A chance to be blessed when we do things God's way. If we don't we end up merely finding another door of misunderstanding to pass and we don't do it very well.

It is part of learning and if we do it right, we come through better off and clear on our spiritual sight. Such is the nature of growing in the Lord.

To bad some of us take longer than others to reach the same point. And that is the journey where even if you stumble you do benefit in the process once you see God hand helping along the way.

MESSAGES

Salty froth bubbling on the grains
as oceans liquidity sheet withdraws
leaving behind its layers of silent salient thoughts,
sea crest secrets to tease the senses.

Marine mysteries begging to be remembers
swirls of aqua caresses sculpting sandy song,
where are left the emblems from tides
singing what fish see while sleeping.

Yielding the simple voice of oneness between earth and water
with the saddest puzzle being how we miss the solution

TREAD AND SKIPPING

To tread upon ground where you have never walk can be a joy you savor because it is a newness in your life. It brings some insight and benefit you didn't have before.

Hopefully it is a blessing too. One that makes the experience feel worthwhile. That is the challenge with new experience, to feel the joy it might offer.

This is where the real problem can materialize. For depending on the experience we can ether find profit or a curse. Sometimes these are good occasions other s they are not.

And the challenge with anywhere we travel for the first time is to ask where is God in the process. There are plenty of times we don't bother with that part.

Oh we might not voice our thoughts that way, but we probably have let it cross our minds. So it is more like, wow that was fun, er oh gee, thank you god. Whew, that felt good.

As if God really is impressed with that kind of prayer. But it doesn't keep us from saying such things even though we are busy skipping off wherever to savor some moment.

What is sad is how often we can discover that God truly does have a hand in a given moment. It is one he brings into our life to teach us something important.

But without listening to the Lord how can we ever find his grace in a second? That is so easy to miss.

This can get so complicated if along the way we get so caught in something we don't even think of this aspect. And I admit that if you are going to somewhere such as an amusement park, you probably aren't thinking in terms of spirituality.

However, at some point one might see God in the beauty and joy. That can be at times enough.

For the Lord is not insensitive to who we are or our needs. He does understand our having times we require to have our hearts touched in special ways.

This is not always about sitting and praying all the time. It is a commendable and there are times when it is beneficial. Just not a requirement that we do it all the time.

There are so many who often love to reduce life down to only living and doing certain things. Chores always figure in there. As does work.

And church becomes for them another chore. One to endure because it is a ticket for heaven.

Only problem is it never truly becomes what we hope and we might miss out on how with the Lord he isn't against smiles.

DARK OFFERINGS

You call me being stupid here, but honestly I have to wonder about some people's sanity when it comes to dealing with dark forces. Is there logic to associating with forces dedicated to evil?

I just don't see the benefit. Anyone that things Satan rewards loyalty is truly to be pitied. They are so sadly deceived.

I have never seen or experienced anything that has left me feeling that Satan wants in any way to be somebody's friend. He'll lie and make all kinds of promises, but eternity will not be a blessed by following him.

The reality we do know is that life is not perfect. And all of us have times when it has hardship.

Being a Christian does not guarantee a happy life with no problems. If it did I'm sure no one would reject it.

But the truth is no life lives in paradise. We all find our valleys and mountains at times. Some are harder to travel than others.

Only that will not improve though a quick fix alignment with some dark forces. It might sound appealing to some, but never improves life in the long run.

Naturally those that do not accept the scripture record wouldn't worry about how Satan is painted in the bible. Nor will they most likely be concerned that he is an enemy of God.

Personally, I do not find being an enemy of God to be a good option. The Lord is not exactly one who has equals in terms of power.

So how one expects being in connection with his enemy will improve things I have no idea. But it appears to work for some people.

What a pity to get caught up in the snare of lies and think you will prosper. And a person may even do that for a while.

But it never lasts. Sooner or later that will come to an end. Most likely not when person expects it either.

Such is the sad state of life when you choose the wrong spiritual path. It looks so appealing and easy to travel.

But you can't always see the end of the road. Or the cliff which waits. Falling off the whole time thinking you were getting ahead.

And while you are falling you hear a mocking laughter, cold and evil to add to the pain.

BAD JOYS

I've heard it said that there is joy in sin for a season. Meaning that while some might claim sin has no pleasure, the truth is that it will be very appealing at times.

Just doesn't mean it will last. Nor does it mean we will reach a point of decide it doesn't feel good either.

In fact we can become totally addicted to such desires to the point that it overrides our thinking. All we want is that next fix or rush of joy.

It truly does become an obsession at times. And that is never something that leads to permanent changes, merely side roads into oblivion.

There will always be sins in life. We can't avoid them. But we don't have to go looking to hitchhike on a bus headed to doom either.

I'm always fascinated by those who feel so much in control of their lives. They never do anything wrong.

Not that they will admit to it you understand. They just feel very comfortable seeing the world dressed in perfection they created.

It is all less than a dream or salvation. But they will never embrace the truth. So we mosey along that path of delusion, happy and content that it tastes so good.

Then comes the day when it kills. Well it cripples to some degree. Oh the grief we endure in such situations.

Never really facing what is in the mirror, just happy to make it seem like it is a tragedy. And the whole time we are the ones holding the smoking gun.

So we are happy to keep hang in with our nest of wrongs and think there is no problem. Until the consequences take place.

Nobody really loves that option. We love the pleasure, but hate when it carries some kind of pain.

Such is human nature. And if one is a Christian God will often open our eyes to the reality of what we have done wrong.

At least for the sake of making us aware of our need for salvation. There is no one though who enjoys facing that reality.

It can be very depressing. But it is necessary for the sake of our knowing the truth. As long as we don't bring ourselves to some juncture of thinking life is without the need for improvement and we are never perfect.

STAR STRESS

We swim the onyx endless canopy of eve
wondering if silvery serpents wait to strike,
burdened in our evolving epiphanies
civilization's cumbersome expanding manufactured metaphors
lumbering as toxic paranoia Goliaths
creating foreboding phantom dazzles
within the spectrum of possibility's gaze.

A thousand tomes terrorize in tormenting speculation
will Chicken Little Prophets
truly crown sunrise
in an I told you epitaph?

By each breath and beat
there is a miracle,
fleeting and vaporous in security.

Shall some streaking asteroid
write a cosmic final act
to life's play on Mother Earth?

Chance is a cruel prankster
when seen through eyes without a soul,
but for the one sensing and trusting in a divine hand
that manipulates celestial spheres like marbles,
comet apocalypses is not a fickle tale of fated doom.
Instead mankind's history's story which he wrote
before time began.

GOOD PAINS

There are times when we all have to endure some hardship or pain. This is a passage of life, which is not always pleasant, but can be reward in some ways. It depends on if the event or situation helps us to learn.

God doesn't spare us such experiences at times. And we can be sure that in the process that this means if we don't learn we will probably repeat the same mistake.

Learning isn't always enough though. We also need the capacity to forgive ourselves. If we say, "I learned my lesson," but all we did was understand that we won't make that choice again, we have only learned part of the truth.

For without the clarity of appreciating what contributed to the decision process we can cheat ourselves out of certain knowledge. One might learn to say avoid jumping off a cliff if we did it once and got hurt, providing we survive.

But know such will cause pain is not the same as truly recognizing what motivated us to make a given choice. I have seen those who learned to avoid pain but never got in touch with inner drives that lead to the pain.

And there are so many times when this is the sad aspect of the process. Oh one can invest in all kinds of methods of learning these truths.

But if the core of the issue revolves around a spiritual aspect then all that other form of wisdom won't improve the understanding. This only God can do.

He will through the power of his Holy Spirit lead us to insight that helps see what cripples our thinking in the first place. It doesn't mean we will always end up being prudent and avoiding another mistake.

What it does is give us the truth. And that can truly help in the process. For other what lies at the core of our drives is tied to sin.

That is so thought of as a bad thing. Yet it is easier to candy coat the truth for the sake of pretending we don't sin?

For some it seems to be. Which is sort of like trying to put a puzzle together without all the pieces.

You will get a picture of what the puzzle looks like, but it will never be accurate. And when we understand how we are flawed and will be so able to fall into such crevices it does help produce a certain degree of freedom.

For we don't have to keep thinking of ourselves as perfect or totally in charge of all we do. Then we have a better chance to trust God instead of just to our own strength. That can be the hardest of all lessons to learn.

PAST PRIME

Age does certainly have the power to diminish our lifestyle to some degree. Anyone who thinks that isn't going to happen is bound to have disappointments in life.

And I have seen such people all my life. Which is truly sad when you can't cope with reality. Not that we have to necessarily resign ourselves to lessening expectations.

We will always need a balance between desires and reality. To still try and do all we can and not give up.

On a spiritual level this is even more important. We can reach a point of thinking God doesn't plan on us doing anything demanding with our lives.

If we think that then we have to remind ourselves that God chose Moses when he was other than young. And many others have been called to serve him who were past their prime in terms of age.

So we will always need to listen to God's spirit in that regard. And not focus on thinking life is over in terms of challenges to our faith.

It is easy to sit in the pews and vegetate. To think we are beyond any demands that might challenge us for we are to old to be that useful.

This is of course another form of not trusting the Lord. And I have see so many who have become pew sitters.

That is a sad condition. To become so complacent and indifferent to the Lord's will and the whole time think you are a good and faithful servant.

So we need to find that harmony inside and pray to always listen when he calls. That might not be when we want it.

And it might not come in forms we prefer, but it is where our souls must travel. That is part of the journey of faith.

It is just hard at times to always accept that reality. We can get so comfortable in oru ways that we do not enjoy change.

And that is part of what we need to embrace as being our reasonable service to him. A chance to listen and obey when he does call.

It doesn't mean he will demand the impossible. He might expect us to only serve in simple ways.

But that is part of the journey we need to always accept according to his will. Obedience is not something with an age limit.

SCALES OF THE HEART

Winds of impulse beckon
rising as predators in soaring quest,
taking one to heaven on crystal sighs
or the bowels of darkness in descending flight.

Clinging to the frayed and feeble level of lucidity,
soul feels the talons of day and night's charms
ripping at one's fragile grasp of reality,
praying gravity of demons won't strip away feathers.

Juggling the heart's scale on a precarious tray of values
hoping it never falls off, along with one's will.

YES AND NO

I personally am not a big fan of this type of answer. One where the truth can go swing either for good or bad.

And naturally that only produces a lot of stress. Which wouldn't be so bad if life didn't have so many detours.

They just drive us nuts with their uncertainty. That can truly make life other than pleasant.

But one can not avoid these circumstances. And it doesn't how much you trust to God, you will not be spared the moments that lead to groans.

You can pretend to make sense of them. But two edged sword events are part of reality. Not the kind we want to enjoy, just ones we can't ignore.

So our choice is how we cope. And that can be such a trauma at times. I guess that is what at times makes me totally annoyed dealing with certain types of experts.

I will ask a question that I expect to have a yes or no answer. Instead I get one that is vague.

It makes me want to scream, "get to the point!" Only it never improves the situation. I"m looking for facts and they want to give me theory.

However, in reality there are times when that is not a choice. You have to accept the fact, however annoying it is that some aspects of life never will make sense.

I didn't say I like it, just know it is what I have accepted. And that moves me to the realm of accepting there are times when life just requires less thought and more intuition.

Which for me translates into accepting there are occasions when we can solve problems by our own strength. That isn't perhaps the answer we want. But it is the honest one.

And for that I have tried to accept it as a good thing. For once I get past that issue of trying to analyze each detail to death, I accept how only God can know some answers.

It doesn't mean I cherish such moments. But it does make me appreciate God all the more.

And that gives its own form of piece. Not always what feels like a enough perhaps. But enough to keep marching according to his promises.

It might not be the perfect solution to life, but it is one that will keep us facing in the right direction.
For that I am grateful for the lesson.

LEGACY

We are all descendants of Adam and Eve. Which means whatever was their lot in life after their fall from grace is passed on to us.

I can say that makes me personally happy. I mean in all fairness, I would like it if we had some choice.

But we don't. It is part of life that we must embrace even if it doesn't translate into joy. It doesn't relate to understanding though.

It is hard to say what all was the consequence of their fall in the garden and what would have happen regardless. So we can't always be clear on that part.

What we do know is that perfection is not part of the program. Whether they were perfect before I can't say. I just know that none of us is perfect now.

As for if we will ever be perfect in eternity, I guess that depends on your concept of perfect. I don't think that the kind of perfection we think of in this life will apply to eternity. It will be different.

Hopefully that means better. At least for the redeemed. As for those who are condemned I'm not sure a perfect form of judgment will make anyone smile.

But then I don't plan to be among those that finds out that problem. I will prefer to celebrate the joy of being in the lord's presence.

In the meantime we must content with the legacy passed on in this life. Which will always be a challenge.

One if focused right through the eyes of faith is able to see God despite the chaos. And that is the best part of the legacy we can have.

Which is the part I think we need to cling to the most. That no matter how much life fluctuates in demands we can still trust to the Lord.

This is easy to forget at times. We can be consumed with so many other thoughts and that is never quite what it should be.

That is so easy to get lost in the midst of all the other things we think and do. That becomes the challenge for us to fathom what should be the clear in our minds.

This will always be a challenge. It is so easy to have it mixed up in the midst of life's struggles.

Remembering our true legacy is what helps to guide on where life should be lived. But with God's help we can always remember.

ELEMENTAL SADNESS

Sorrow is a cloud that smothers the soul. It darkens the sight and makes day feel like night.

And sometimes we seem to have no choice, but endure such sad times. They may come not because we did anything wrong, but the consequence of a circumstance that is common to most of humanity.

But even in the midst of such suffering some times we can discover some true we were meant to know. And when the time provides to be able to gaze back and understand the purpose it served.

This is not always easy though. For the heart when wounded doesn't like to do much beyond stop hurting.

And our mind can drift to usual complaints. Finding reasons to feel it is all unfair and that it is a form of punishment.

Time and the Lord's spirit can grant us insight into the fact that this is not reality. That we are in fact just another travel on life's road that stumbled for one reason or another.

If we look deeply into the moment and understand what drives and is the origin of such experience then light can come to our darkness. It might not heal our wounds, but it may help us understand them better.

I don't think there is a way to always feel good about bad situations. But I do believe we can understand them.

What is the merit of this? Well for one thing it can give us balance. We can sort out when something is our fault instead of the result of circumstance.

It is amazing how many times people will face a trial and never want to admit they might have caused it to happen. They will always have some reason to say it was somebody else's fault.

That works for some in order to avoid guilt. But it doesn't change the truth. Just our perception.

This is not always the way we prefer to embrace each valley. It can be a heaviness we do not wish to endure.

But in the end, we are still going to take the journey and will have the times of stubbed toes. We can look for the rocks or pretend they aren't there.

However, they will always be part of the trip and with God's help we can keep on the right path as we head towards eternity.

ETERNAL ARMS

Sisters dueling thoughts barbed and fired
love snarled from crevice so deep inside,
mother's touch sleeping in her plot,
the valley in their hearts growing darker
without her light to shine upon them.

But in the storm of seconds
words burning so heated and hurtful,
calm mysteriously sweeps over them,
disputes end in tears and hugs,
mother's wings working forgiveness magic.

CURES

Isn't this a great thing? I think so. Having something be the solution to your problems that will make life perfect.

Such miracle cures are rare if you find them at all. Not that it really is going to occur very often even if we want.

We can imagine such fantasies, but that doesn't mean it will happen. Still we do love believing in the impossible at times.

What is sad is when we clothe life in excuses. Those moments of failure that we figured we could have cured if we just made different choices.

The point I think that applies to such situations is that we are probably avoiding the truth that we wouldn't have made sure choices. That is one truth, which is very hard to embrace at times.

I always marvel at the people who get in moods of resolve. Those emotional times when one speaks of hope for tomorrow.

Oh all the things the person is going to do in order to change their life for the better. Normally that never ends up being reality. Just sounds good at the time.

How often I have seen those at the gym looking for cures. They enter for the first time looking for that instantaneous cure to a life time of ignoring fitness.

This never results in change. Because in reality they are not prepared to move beyond the arena of fantasy to the price of obtaining your dreams.

Cures at times are not immediately. God will empower us to have a cure for some problems.

But with the Lord his cures are never imperfect. Nor are they very often immediate. Often they take a long time. And can be hard work to maintain.

We love the immediate and easy solutions. But those are not always the type that bless in the long run.

You just can't get everyone to appreciate that. Some will reject it. They will presume immediate always work.

Meanwhile the person of faith keeps trusting even when the moment doesn't bring a cure in our timing. If we stay on the path and walk as God intends, the cures will come.

Maybe not in the way we want. But in a way that will last. Providing we listen to the Lord and not our impatience.

WEIGHT OF DAYS

WEIGHT OF DAYS

Harshness of life burdens the mind. Carrying down a path that is heavy and depressing. Always wondering if there is a way to avoid it, but being aware there is no life without a few tears.

Do they have to dominate life though? That can be a tough question to answer. I know some for whom that would be true.

It is sad and never truly grants one happiness. I have seen this sadness so often with some people.

Nothing ever gives them gives them joy. It doesn't matter how much they have or how many time God blesses, they still are unhappy.

And does this please God? I don't think so. I see it as a tragedy. For the reality is that if one continues to complain and not be grateful for the Lord's blessings, sooner or later their will be a price paid.

Not that it means he will strike one down in all cases. He has done that at times. But in some situations he will remove the blessings.

Others he will not. He will grant some the blessings in life until the die. So they will end up being held accountable without excuse for their lack of faithfulness to him.

And the whole time the person may presume they are prove of God's approval in the process. They are so out of touch with God's spirit they can't in any way fathom how they are not being blessed.

But that is part of the judgment they go through. They just sit blindly thinking they are beloved of God. Regarding themselves as his favorite.

The whole time they are void of his truth and spirit. Living completely blind to the truth. And in the process they find out only when standing before him they were wrong.

It is too late at that point to taste of his real blessings. Then they merely must face his righteous judgment.

This is part of the process of accountability that never leads to salvation. It is the path that is followed that is broad and never leads to heaven.

Just a detour into the land where one justifies their sins as being blessings. They live their lies and think that they are redeemed.

Pity it takes eternity for them to see the truth. And to never embrace the facts when it might have made a difference. Such is the nature of spiritual pride that always is other than a blessing.

REQUIEM GUSTS

She stood on the hill, numb and tearful
the cold November wind bites at her face in chilling knives.

Lifting the urn and taking off the lid,
slowly her hands poured his ashes in to the air,
watching the gust take them towards the skies.

Her heart swirls in sadness and irony of relief
following the last request of her father regarding his ashes.

Listening to those funeral tales of his being a saint and prince
wondering how they couldn't know him as the demon of her youth,
letting the wind swallow the fiction, his love the best lie of all.

TESTS OF FEATHERS

Feathers for me are the little circumstances that tease in some special way. Not always as a blessing, but neither as a tragedy either. They can be neutral in terms of how the impact you other than you are aware of their reality.

What makes these feathers important is because of they say about our values and heart. Often the stress they produce can truly touch somewhere deep inside. We end up losing control and making some mistake.

And the whole time we think we are okay. That we are in control and not vulnerable to such stimulus.

Then comes the time when we have to embrace the reality that we do have a dark side. And do make mistakes. Even worse about how we have done something sinful.

For a person who ties his or her salvation to being perfect that is a worse problem. Because it is hard to avoid not a sin is not a good thing regardless of how we choose to rationalize it.

So it only becomes such a tendency to avoid facing this problem. We prefer to simply find some way to avoid that little problem.

It never works in fact. But it doesn't keep us from trying. Instead we spend the time letting ourselves reject the truth. Those little feathers are and can be such a major test of our spirit.

And along the way we might learn our lesson. Or try to figure out a way to make the feathers become a way to fly

The whole time God still is loving and merciful and longsuffering. He will not take away of feathers. Just keep letting them stroke us until we face the truth.

This often doesn't happen. Instead we will often do anything to not face the truth. Because it is so much easier to see ourselves as in control.

Weakness never makes us happy to embrace. And our pride can often fight to ignore such details.

Until the time comes when we just can stop facing the feathers as something to ignore and let God help us to use them to fly. That doesn't always happen when we wish.

But God is merciful to us and will guide us slowly in the right direction. Unless we resist to long.

Then the feathers will start to burn and become a thorn that never stop digging at our conscience.

LISTNING TO THE WIND

The wind in this case I am referring to is the Holy Spirit. It is when God's spirit comes across you life in a way that is intended to get your attention.

But like a wind, it is not obvious in terms of being seen in a way that one might always understand clearly. Often this comes in ways where we feel a caressing nudge in our spirit. We can feel the breath of God blowing through a situation in a way that drives it in a direction where you know it is no accident.

How often it is so hard to truly appreciate this experience. In our haste to rush through surviving some event we block on being able to see what is profound or meaningful in it. Just wipe off our brow and move ahead.

Of course there is also the problem of facing the times when things happen that God is not involved with a given situation. You can chase a wind that doesn't exist a times, letting you imagination fill in the details.

But when God truly is moving through a moment and we feel so refresh by his grace, it can truly inspire. It can touch us so deeply.

And in the process our faith is inspired. We feel more than just living. Savoring the miracle of life as gives us joy.

Some, sadly never will understand or accept this. They will simply mosey along and never heard the wind.

Such is the nature of people who don't not have spiritual ears. Somewhere in the process of going to church and all the rituals they grew deaf.

God hasn't stopped talking, they just have stopped listening, content to only hear their own voice. And that never inspires God's touch on life.

To move ahead with joy and glad tidings. To feel his breeze truly grace is a miracle that doesn't happen to many.

When it does the joy is astounding and rich. It can bring a new sense of harmony where not existed before.

But again one has to be prepared to truly listen and see. To move beyond the conventional and reach for the sublime.

All of which caresses and nurtures when we allow it too. When our hearts see into the ordinary and feel his wind moving through life's rafters.

This is a blessing that can truly be source of praise. What pity when we rob ourselves of this gift.

SPOKEN

How easily we make promises and never keep them. It isn't that people always are so fickle, but they just have more desire than reality at times.

This is part of what is hard for me personally. I don't like to make vows that I don't intend to keep.

Just really bothers me when people say they will do something then don't even remember making such a promise. Which really annoys me.

But this is just a case of personal preference and trying not to apply my values to somebody else. Plus understand that not everyone has that same priority.

I can't think of the number of people I have known who have in their name the moods where they truly want to do things different. If you talk to them at a given time they will be so full of energy and positive.

And if they actually did follow through with their plans it would be great. But somewhere between the passion of the moment and the reality of actually following through, the desire evaporates.

I think a lot of this has to do with the fact that in our fantasies when we imagine doing something all we visualize is perfect. But when we go to try and do it in person, well the things like exhaustion and pain enter in.

Such is the nature of life. Our basic need to stir the fires of passion from time to time without actually getting burnt.

And on the human level that is just an aspect of our own behavior. When it involves our choices in terms of what we do with God, then it takes on a different nature.

For God is longsuffering, but I don't think it ever impresses when we make vows we don't keep. That just leaves its scar on our soul.

It is so much better to take the time to do it right. To be able to reach out in faith, but actually reach out.

Saying you trust God with your lips, but not with your hands is not a way to improve the relationship one has with the lord. And it will also intrude upon what God does in terms of your calling.

Those who always say one thing and do another will never truly find themselves being called upon by the Lord in a way that is critical to his will. But some never truly understand this. So they just end up walking in circles and asking the question of why God never sends them to serve him. Which becomes a case of another less than sterling time of spirituality.