WITHOUT

Need is never an aspect of life that we enjoy. And it can be very tough to separate out need from want.

They sure can seem the same at times. When you are stressed out over life all problems seems like they are life threatening.

And if the emotions get a foothold on your mind that will make it even worse. So that makes it hard to focus on what is really important.

The mind can always conjure so many excuse to justify behavior that we never asked God about in prayer. If it sounds good then we just accept it

I can recall this couple once that had decided to embark on this part time business. They were going to make crafts to sell in stores.

These were going to be inspirational and they would sell them at Christian book stores. Now at no point did they mention ever asking the Lord if this was his will.

But they sure were convinced it was the right choice. They even went out and bought a SUV in anticipation of needing the room for all the crafts they would sell.

This "blessing" from the lord lasting about two months. They never did sell any crafts, but oh they sure had faith that God was going to bless the effort.

Eventually, they had to let the SUV be repossessed. And later they never mentioned the adventure at all.

I think if I remember, they did donate the crafts to the church for tax purposes. I believe they ended up in a closet.

It had a door that seldom was opened. Which was probably for the best. Sometimes darkness is a great way of hiding secrets.

I do believe that God does provide and more than just our needs at times. But one does have to be willing to listen.

And that is never easy for some. Which is why God is merciful to us at times. That is the part we all can savor.

Enough to look into the daylight and honestly seek his will rather than our own desires as priority. It should be enough for use.

Sometimes it is. Others we just sit and wonder. We move ahead in stumbling steps, hopefully grateful for his grace.

I know I am. And always will be.

HASTE

Haste is easy to avoid. It just requires patience. I personally don't have any so that does complicate the problem in my case.

And it always seem that when I'm the most pressed for time that other issues come to bear upon my life. So that always makes things worse from my view.

But I do try as much as possible to accept there is time and place for everything, just hard to let my heart accept that at times. It is an endless challenge at times.

The one thing that ought to influence one's thinking is naturally eternity. That doesn't mean it does.

I'm not sure why some people who claim to be Christians become so obsessed with this life. We do have to live it, but at what expense?

Really, isn't that a fair question? Do we obsess with the here and now? Sure seems like it at times.

I have to admit that I get caught up in the same priorities on occasion. It doesn't mean that I claim that is God's doing.

Just one of those things that happens to me at times. And I do my best to accept that is just a fact that I know is part of life.

Oh we can excuse such impatience. That isn't very unusual. Just means we don't always admit.

It is difficult at times to balance what is critical to the now verses what is important to forever. Desires and needs to color our thoughts and sense of priority.

And when that happens if we don't listen to the Lord's spirit we will keep translating what is important by only our needs. This can be so pathetic when it comes to causing harm to others.

I can believe the times I've seen this is churches. Oh they never admit their behavior is selfish, just prefer to claim it is not their fault.

And the more skilled they are at lying the more they will find some way to justify greed and selfishness as being spiritual. Such is the nature of life.

We always find ourselves in the joy of not seeing things the way God sees them. And always finding a good way to say it is okay.

But when we stop only listening to our clock and listen to eternity's ticks then perhaps we see time by God's standards.

WASTE

Loss of what might have been is never a good feeling. Regret stabs at us in such situations.

And that is to be expected. For there is nothing we can do that will allow us to turn back the clock and in some way reclaim what never was. It remains a ghost in our thoughts, a reminder of some desire that never was given life.

Sometimes in life we never do truly get a chance to claim those lose opportunities. They just remain lost. It is a postcard of lament to add to our scrap of sorrow.

One thing I have often wondered about is does the Lord in any way have a plan in eternity to see that all the things we lost in this life get restored or fulfilled in eternity? I do know he has promised to wipe away every tear.

We are really told what that means exactly. But to me nothing wipes away tears as much joy. Does that mean that what we thought would give us joy in this life will happen in eternity?

I can't answer that. I do know if some joy we missed out on in this life is only related to this life, would it really matter in eternity? If I didn't get my heart's desire say with some Christmas present, will that matter in the next life?

Personally, I don't think so. We will have a different frame of reference and that always is one grounded in the enlightened state that touches us when in God's presence.

There are so many things we can know about heaven while in this life. But I don't think that it will ever be a place of pain.

I have been touched in a way that makes me appreciate there is a joy in knowing things you never could know in this lie A time when we can savor so much more than is here.

However, I do feel that our talents and who we are as a person will truly be so much more empowered and blessed in that time.

And just clinging to that knowledge helps to make the absence of dreams a more quiet experience than one of constant tears. I can't live that for somebody else though.

I can only share and hope it touches with some hug of encouragement for those struggling through some valley. Perhaps the shadows can't be ended, but maybe they can be less harsh.

Which if we succeed in that joy, it is truly other than waste. And that will always be a source of thanks giving if we see it as a blessing instead of a failure.

Through the eyes shine the moments the soul carries to eternity.

MESSENGER OF GRACE

He strolls the shimmering silvery stones
where every soul who touches Heaven's shore
first treads when passing into eternity.

His immortal senses listen to the echoes of their lives
just as he has done for eons,
having seen every vivid detail of creation,
all the seconds lived,
no single thought has missed his attention,
nor any pain passed without his feeling its hurt.

At Eden he stood watch, sensing their shame
when Adam and Eve were forced to leave,
always vigilant to silently soothe a wounded soul.

In the eternal rays of golden love his essence always dwells,
passed on in obedience as the Lord commands.

Fierce in righteousness, diligent in mercy are ways he follows.
Reaching down to touch any spirit
when their prayers rise as incense before God's throne.

Everlasting omnipotence flows through his being,
but never flares except as the Most High wills,
always spreading the wings of grace
across the humanity to comfort and inspire.

In a blink, he obeys the call
transforming from creature of pure incandescent glory
and into a shabbily dressed homeless figure,
wandering city streets to test the hearts of men.

PASTE

How easy it is to always want some type of paste to repair all the mistakes of life. It would be nice if there was a permanent type that would accomplish that purpose.

But real life never seems to quite end up that way. We just never are able to find the perfect way to stop remembering those mistakes. They just haunt is in so many ways.

And sometimes it becomes so easy to blame those errors on somebody else. Denial works to a degree as a form of paste.

However, it when it dries and turns brittle that can truly make such paste fail to help. It will end up just crumble and fall apart.

I often been fascinated at the thought process some people go through to avoid admitting the obvious. Why is it so hard for us to simply accept we make mistakes and are imperfect?

I'm not saying trying to approve isn't important. There is never a point in life where change and improvement are not something to seek.

But if they don't come can we accept what that means? Are we truly able to embrace when our shortcomings are like demons we can't in any way exorcise by our own strength.

I've been dealing with a lot of people lately who seem to have a need to justify their unhappiness. They do this by looking for solutions from some outside source instead of looking within.

That is the one thing I enjoy about God's grace. When one is forgiven as your are, you don't have to keep pretending about being less that perfect.

Sin remains sin. It is the spiritual infection that affects us in so many ways and influences how we think and behavior.

But accepting that is not that easy for many. We just are far more comfortable with the stories we can invent that makes us less flawed.

It can be so hard to embrace the truth. To look deeply into one's soul and see how we are in need of God's strength in our lives instead of merely clinging to our own abilities.

This is a song that can be replayed as often as needed providing sooner or later we really hear the notes. And it is a melody that we won't always embrace.

Such is the mysteries of life. We know the answers, but keep cloaking it in secret so it sounds better than it is. God spares us having to hear the reality at times in this life and that is a blessing.

AWESOME

This is another of those pet words some people love to banter around. You know use it to mean something truly amazing.

Course that is all subjective. I had this one person I knew that used this word to pretty much describe everything. Which took the impact out of its meaning from my view.

This person never seem to see it that way. Well to be honest the individual wasn't quite accustom to shall we say the sophisticated life. So for this person reruns on television were awesome. We didn't spend a lot time together.

What is really spectacular? Again it depends on the person. And when it comes to spiritual matters it can be even a bigger problem.

For while if you have faith even dawn can be awesome, you might have trouble getting somebody who is asleep to appreciate that reality. And even more so if they are asleep.

The point I guess is how tough it is to put our values on somebody else. And with God even more so.

Doesn't make them wrong, just hard to express adequately at times. So we must accept we can't always do that.

I will admit that when God's spirit touches in some special and you really are led to see the Lord has done as awesome it can truly overwhelm. It just touches so powerful to feel that reality.

Again it doesn't work in terms of others. Your eyes can't necessarily touch their hearts. And if you think they can then you are only kidding yourself.

But to be able to wake up and face the morning with faith's eyes gives it a special joy. It makes it come alive and be so powerful.

The heart can fly on wings of such happiness, even if it is only for a moment. But it is more than some will ever have.

Riches are the measure of life that fills the soul when it comes from God. It is a cold and lifeless gold if it is only from the bank.

We can embrace it or love it, but if we never see God among the pearls we are impoverished. Only we may not even accept it.

To move ahead is to savor the joys beyond our pocketbook. And since God inspires it that can truly grant us such calm and peace. A way to lift the night where others are in shadows. One path in solitude where others may not follow that can truly echo in the chants of awesome.

ETERNAL

Mind blazes from perfect sight
where nothing dulls the senses,
time never drains the spirit
and total consciousness is one's blood.

Spirit clothed in pure radiance,
aura shines from divine love,
every thought sings a thousand songs,
no tears ever flow again.

Timeless, is how one resides
amid a city's incredible splendor
of translucent walls in colors never before seen,
able to absorb each layer of ethereal reality
that has its own substance, but never ages.

It is a realm where creativity never ceases,
purged of shadows
only what is truly gold thrives.

Taking shapes and forms
more than this life could imagine,
without darkness, nor evil,
or the plots of mankind.

Peace clings to the essence,
free at last to dream
where our greatest longings
no longer remain
bed time fantasies.

SUPER

I work with this one person who sees everything good as super. At least that is the word choice this person uses all the time.

I'm not personally inclined to see it as a good thing. Only because it to me doesn't really translate into reality for most of the things in life.

Well not from what I have experienced. For me this is one of those things like saying "have a nice day." You never really mean it. Just something that gets said to be polite.

Sort of like asking, "Are how you?" We will ask it out of habit, but I doubt we really want to know the answer.

And if the person did really answer it we might smile, but would probably forget the comment later. Not so much because we don't care, but because we didn't really ask expecting an answer.

There is and always will be a difference between the dialogue of concern and the dialogue of passing social niceties. And it is always important to appreciate the difference.

One is a question of real concern the other just a passing comment. In social settings or at work or some salespersons I think we are conditioned to hear such things. They roll off our back without really soaking into our thinking.

Which is why we might expect otherwise in a spiritual setting. We just have hirer anticipations when it comes to spiritual arenas.

Is that realistic? Well perhaps. But it would in part be dependent on if the setting truly where love exists or just one that is draped in pseudo righteousness. That is a climate where people say all the right words out of habit, but don't actually care.

And why I think is because it is expected. Not helpful ultimately, but expected by some. It is the widow dressing of feigned compassion that is used to create the illusion that God is involved with what takes place.

I have seen those who genuinely are possessed of God's spirit. They are not prone to be over dramatic or make themselves seem more loving than they really are. They do not have the need to lie about their feelings or act in a way that makes them appear to be other than what they are.

Perfect is not the word that applies to this situation. But it does involve honestly. God inspires genuine reactions. It will be natural and sincere. That is the mark of God's presence.

But sometimes it just needs to be reminded in our thinking.

ELEMENTAL YAWNS

Is there any way to make dull a reason to smile? Honestly, if something is monotonous why should we try and make it sound like it is fantastic?

Now I do feel that there are times things are not meant to always be excited. I got into a disagreement at one point on this issue when it came to Christianity.

I was dealing with this person who felt you really were a good Christian unless you smile and laughed all the time. Which given the fact that the life of faith often has so many challenges and valleys I did wonder how this could be reality.

And I didn't notice that to be the case in his situation either from what I noticed. He had as many sad times as they rest of us. Just didn't care to admit it.

Did this improve anything? Not as far as I could tell. It only make things worse. And who would regard that as a good thing?

I'm not sure lying about your feelings in any way makes life better. I also don't think it somehow makes God all that happy either.

However, when one has his own private agenda in terms of what one believes it is not surprising. And for now that will always be less than what will impress me.

Fortunately the one thing that does happen with such approaches is that sooner or later truth will bear down upon the illusion. All the lies will fall apart and the truth will dig at one's sense of reality.

Will that mean the person will change? Not always. Sometimes they just slip farther into the abyss of delusion.

That never makes one a better or happier person. It can actually have the opposite effect. And that will never be how to improve life.

But for the person who truly seeks truth, he or she will embrace whatever the truth is suppose to mean.

It might be painful, it might be good, but we will never have need for it to be a lie on purpose. Which is the only way to find peace in the midst of such options.

You will never persuade some of this. They will keep dancing in their underwear essence of denial.

And keep doing so regardless of what happens. For that is the nature of how such things work with them.

As for me, well I'm happy to take what comes and pray it will give a few real smiles along the way.

PROFOUND

When something is profound it is often a truth hidden deep beneath the obvious. And some people never can find that type of meaning in things.

They will see it when somebody else points it out, but not if looking themselves. Such is the nature of life.

Such truths always leave us other than appreciative of their meaning in the ordinary nature of life. Partly because we just might not feel inclined to want to dig that deep into some aspects. There are simply too many things in life that fall under the category of what we do out of necessity. So there isn't necessarily much motivation to dig very deep into their origins or meaning.

Instead we mill through each moment doing what we can to gleam what works for us. Which is never always quite enough time for the kind of concentration to inspire us to figure out every metaphor life offers.

So we just mosey along at times, stopping when the moment requires for us figure out the significance of something. Which can truly stun at times when we do stop to sort of smell the roses.

All of which is the normal process of life. However, when it affects us spiritually it matters in a different way.

For with God there are the elements of profound that can truly inspire our faith. They can be details that can touch on such a wonderful level.

To be able to embrace them requires the power of the holy spirit too. One can not find see the things of God without his spirit's empowering.

You don't have to be a pastor for this to happen. But it still has to be at the Lord's empowering.

The other problem is that we might always want to hear what God has to say. His truths aren't based upon our needs or wants.

Some will always try to conform it though. They will do what they can to try and make it according to their own values.

And if it in anyway contradicts what we want then we often will resist listening. Which only makes things worse.

But that is a matter of human response and it has always been a problem for us. A point of difficulty that will tax us in due season.

Hopefully God will only have to nudge to some degree to get us to embrace it.

BANQUETS

Each generations lives
in a time frame
frozen by senses to those events
and climates.

But we all have hearts,
feelings and a soul.

Knowing what it is
that touches everyone.

We each have need for love,
being cared about
as well as believing
in more than getting by.

So if I were to have the chance,
I would serve a banquet of love,
letting another generation know,
how it really isn't about
what you have or don't have,
more what is inside.

You can face tomorrow's horizon
seeing only cactus and deserts,
only let an older hand take yours,
together walking towards
unseen sanctuaries
their weary eyes
have seen by experience.

STARTING

How easy it is to make excuses for not doing things. Oh the reasons can be so fruitful if you want to explain why one didn't do something.

Still, if one gets to the chore and reality, we know how all of this is just window dressing. That is always so hard to avoid.

Underneath is always the current of our real motives. We can hide from it or we can embrace it, but it doesn't mean we will always face the truth.

Not that we are any different from others in that regard. None of us is without the talent for practicing denial in that regard.

Procrastination often dogs us when we are face doing things we really don't want to do. It can really wear us out. That is the challenge that digs deep into our essence and speaks to what we fear.

So many things can intrude upon our actions. In the general course of activity that is often not the big problem we might expect.

One can easily avoid things like volunteer occasions, meetings or just about anything that there are few if any consequences. We just don't have to worry very much when we resist being involved. And so often it is not a question of fear. More of a lack of desire or willingness to be committed on such a level.

But on a spiritual level things are always different. For the devil will always stab us with reasons not to trust God.

Which is made worse by the fact that faith requires action. Without it we really are just keeping our trust in God in our head and never or heart.

It can be so easy do fail to understand how this is different. And the unenlightened person truly will not see the problem.

But they will feel it in due season. For it leads to certain hardening of the spirit. A slow deterioration in feeling towards all things spiritual.

And one can even spend their whole life treading the waters of such stagnant cesspool without ever regarding as bad. Just mosey along without a thought or concern that this is bad.

So often that will not invite any change. One will drift with the tide of resignation, never even suspecting how one is drowning.

Till one is beyond the point to feel the rip tide sucking one away from the lord and his ways.

OLD HAUNTS

My wife and I had occasion to visit a few places we used to find so endearing long ago. We cherished them as places with great ambience.

Only problem is the atmosphere was gone. Time had aged the enchantment. What was charming once is now dead in terms of appeal.

It was sad to see some favorite old haunt lose its soul. For me that is the essence that touches inside which is other than based upon things visible. It is more felt than understood with our senses.

That doesn't always appeal or concern some. They can visit somewhere and only gauge what they see and never what resides beneath the image.

I think God leaves those kinds of spiritual fingerprints in many areas. A way of reminding us of his reality. They can be very inspirational if you inhale them.

But for those who ignore those messages and signs they become less than meaningful. Just another place for distraction.

Such distraction can impede in other ways too. People can be conditioned by life and even in houses of worship to only translate their surroundings by the predictable.

They may never hear the voice of Lord calling from somewhere beyond where they see life. Just another lost message that leaves the person less than feeling God's presence.

But to embrace the Lord and his works reaches beyond the obvious. And in such cases they do allow us to find even in a place of nostalgia something worth cherishing regardless of how it has been transformed by time.

This is sight without eyes. A vision seeing clearly where other see nothing. And one that is and can be a blessing.

However, we don't have to appreciate this reality. We can ignore the signs and lose the valid of the moment.

God leaves his traces for us to find. Some will look and come away with awe. Others will glance and go what?

It is up to us if we wish to see the beauty God gives for us to enjoy or see only what lies on the outside. Time grants us such choices.

I can not say how it will be the Lord's way if we don't embrace it as he intends. Just that we miss out on what was meant if we don't look.

Hopefully, we find the gaze more blessed than not looking.

THOUGHTS

Embers
smoldering ache
lies behind flaccid eyes
rage's stew simmers in the heart
waiting conflict's spoon to serve a helping
speaking softly seduces charade
lips restrain boiling tones
burning scars mind's
embers

BACK AGAIN

It is amazing how many time we ended being forced to return to some valley or trial we already experienced. Which so often comes at a point when we feel we worked so hard to make sure we didn't get detoured to that same place a second time.

Such realities can truly kick one in the stomach and totally demoralize at times. We just feel so frustrated and annoyed by the seeming failure in our ability to control our surroundings.

So in addition to feeling totally depressed you have the added pain of knowing you have lost the illusion of being able to control your life. That never feels good.

Wish we had a way to avoid such options. There are so many times in life that we could say that about. But it never quite works out that way.

In the process we also may fail to appreciate that the Lord has reasons to have us endue the same experience more than once. One being, naturally, that we didn't learn our lessons the first time.

With God, being our heavenly father, he truly does care about our well being. But also for our spiritual health.

So a lesson for us may have more than one purpose. It can be to help us gain understanding about problems we have in this life. Areas where we need to change something.

It can also be a reminder of how we have some part of our lives that we haven't surrendered over to the Lord. Which can be very painful if he already gave us one hint and we ignore it.

Hopefully as we sit in the midst of the valley and feeling sorry for ourselves we can stop long enough to ask the important question. Basically, instead of why are we here, to ask is the Lord trying to send me a message?

Sometimes till we are prepared to ask that question, God will not change our situation. He will keep us in the position till we stop complaining and finally get the message.

There is no set rule in that regard. Every valley is different. You just don't know unless you embrace them for what they truly mean.

Perhaps the most important thing to is being able to accept that we will make mistakes and sometimes the same ones more than once. Forgiving ourselves is one challenge that we will always face no matter where we travel.

But with God's help we will take the steps in his light and not drift off to some shadows where hate blinds.

CARES

This is definitely not a normal condition to be sure. It is hard to imagine in a general situation how this would take place.

But the reality is that there are times when in the midst of some insanity, there is a chance for finding some calm. Hopefully the type of calm where God's spirit touches in some special way.

That can truly inspire a sense of well being. With most people who find a form of calm in the midst of a challenge or crisis, they will offer up some reason for it related to their own means of control. It will be some kind of formula or method that truly does work in their thinking.

But to me this is a focus related mainly to be directed at the individual and not in a way that will work for everyone. Not that every time God's spirit touches it means that things will be in a way that applies to everyone equally.

However, when God is involved it will be more natural and clear that it has no direction to glorify the individual. That truly is the different from my point of view.

And it is intended to help drive one to closer forms of faith. To help us lean closer to the Lord.

That is always a positive aspect. It will be serve to help and not hurt in the long run. To bring a peace and assurance when the next crisis takes place.

With other forms, they may or may not work. It will not always be the kind of guaranteed formula of success.

But that won't keep some from viewing it that way. They will always regard it as a case of their solution is perfect for everyone.

Nice sale if it happens. Such a dream if it were real. But it just never truly seems to work out that way.

Plus as humans, we do often find ourselves in the position where we change. So what happens it that yesterday's solution doesn't work for tomorrow's problem.

All because we changed in the process and not because the nature of such solutions has been altered. Formulas do work at times, just not all the time.

We wander our ways by choice at times. We can either embrace God on that path or we can avoid it.

That is at times the only aspect of choice open to us. And whether we accept it is the question we face every day.

WORMWOOD MAGIC

Well, wormwood for those correctly informed is the reference in the Book of Revelations to the star or heavenly body that strikes the earth and poisons a third of the rivers and oceans. Oh yeah, that will be a Kodak moment to be sure.

The thing is, this happens in the midst of all other kind of tragedies going on during the tribulations. As if people won't have enough insanity to deal with as it is. In this case, this will be yet another unbelievable part of their hell.

Not that people will in any way repent because of it, just that I think it shows when one is God's enemy he knows the best way to ruin your. I perspective you see the situation is such that at time with all the other things going on, at least you had water to drink. So you could still tolerate the other mess.

Then god takes time to be sure even that little joy is taken away. It is that one extra nudge to either force the will to turn to god or make the person end up totally accountable for their rebellion.

Real life can have plenty of wormwood magic at times. Those emergencies that come up with you least expect them. And normally when you are already in the middle of some crisis.

It is like you come home from a really bad day at work and have had a flat tire, along with several other problems to make you upset, then you go to turn on the television and it ends up giving out. All you wanted was one small break from the disasters and instead you get more grief.

Not the kind of joy you can celebrate. More then kind you hate and want to scream about. Only it never does any good.

This is not the type of thing you feel good about. And so often we get caught up in the crisis and frustration we can refuse to see that it might be a message from the Lord. His little hint that maybe we have be more than a little sidetracked from his will.

Do we listen? Probably not. Well we actually take the hint? Hopefully, but no guarantees.

In any event the joy comes from when we can see the wormwood event for what it really is. That is when it counts the most.

And you never know when that will come into our lives and we need to face what is the think that will burden us the most. Namely our spirit being out of touch with God's plans.

Hopefully he doesn't have to bury us with too many occasions of him doing that. Each new star is often a lot worse than the last one. And that only makes the situation far worse the more time you struggle against the message.

PLOTS AND THOUGHTS

I have come to appreciate how often people with agendas and ulterior motives are definitely not acting based upon faith. Now when you are dealing with people who don't claim to have faith to start with that is understandable.

But it gets real annoying and frustrating when such people sit back and claim to be believers. They love to banter about their spirituality, but in reality it is all an act.

For instead of trusting to God, they trust to their own strengths and talents. The problem is the will never admit it.

What is amazing is how such people truly lack the ability not only to trust to God, but accept his power to do more than blessed. That is the part that amazes me the most.

Honestly, I'm left at times just scratching my head. I just can't fathom how they think they can lie and deceive and that nothing bad will ever happen to them.

But when you see how they act and all the times they do other than trust God it does leave one sad. Mainly, for them more than anyone else.

Of course people can so often forget there is a big difference between when you do things that are just sinful from the times you get in the way of God's purposes. Such situations can truly bring consequences.

But if you have no faith to start with and therefore no real fear of the Lord you will not respect this reality. Instead you will plot along and in no way understand the differences when some actions bring more problems in your way than others.

Nothing is more tragic than those who keep refusing to pay attention to the danger signals. No matter how many times that God hints to them that a behavior is wrong, they keep plotting away in that direction anyway.

And when disaster strikes, it is never their fault. Heck, they will probably even ask for prayer about the valley they are in that they claim is not their fault.

Naturally, in their version, they are always a good person. Never in any way responsible for doing a single thing wrong.

It is a lie one tells themselves. A convenient way of avoiding guilt. At least in terms of what they say to others

Just doesn't happen to be reality. Which works for some. But you can't truly be touched by the Holy Spirit without God at times making sure you get those little whispers regarding the error of such deceptions.

But that never actually will make a difference with those who feel they are other than human and plotters of evil.

CRADLE OF STARS

Night unfurls its mystical wand
to wave across the pillow's stage.
Inhaling the eyelid flutter potion
of moonbeam kisses,
slipping silvery strands of stardust sight
over wonder's delicate membrane.

Crossing the boundary between touch and imagined
swaying under the spell of sultry wisps
swirling in surreal currents,
bedazzling beats bewitch in harping celestial elegance
before the mattress becomes a magic carpet
soaring to the realm
where the impossible is never lord.

Flawless lovers await with endless caresses
inside sensuous hammocks
for taking hearts where their heated breaths
can steam the soul.
Elysian teases come with their tantalizing kisses,
while Eden is planted within
having bliss's beauty and gold.

Tomorrow we wander amid the thorns,
but by eve,
rocking so seductively in the exotic spell
from reaching the Sandman's
cradle of stars.

PLAY TIME

Life does have it moments when smiles are in order. I don't feel god every made having fun once and a while a bad thing or one that deserved punishment.

But that doesn't mean it is all the time. And there are so many easy ways we can fall into a valley that we find every moment a reason to goof off.

What is amazing is how often people find some excuse to justify such behavior. Oh the reasons we can invent if we want.

I remember this one person I knew. The individual at one time was very faithful in church service. Totally committed to serving the lord.

Then there came a time when this person was left disillusioned by a pastor's sin. And slowly with drew from all churches.

Of course they had all kinds of good reasons. A need to do soul searching was a big one on the list.

Later, the person told me how much that the individual had enjoyed experiencing and God in nature on Sunday morning. Camping out on the weekends became this individuals new church.

The problem was that the individual totally abandoned serving God in any way. One doesn't have to go to church to serve god, but he will open doors for you to serve him.

You may find those hard to locate if you are too busy spending all your time doing everything to excuse just having fun. God won't even make you feel about it.

But what does happen in the process is that you slowly lose your intimacy with fellowship with the Lord. Without a need to trust him, each day just because a quest for diversion.

And along the way the person may never even appreciate the loss. They won't even feel it.

However, spiritual it will end in a loss of spiritual blessings. All the ways God expresses himself in one's life slowly will dry up and you'll just be treading water.

Only you'll be so busy having your own idea of a good time you won't even care. Only inside will you feel the loss in ways you'll not even imagine.

Such the nature of the life of faith. We live in that nature time and time again, but never feel it's death in our lives at times.

Just it the silence that comes from heaven.

MANNA'S MAJESTY

We chase the horizon of enough
and all the mirages of greed,
just to fill a void
because we only trust
the little gods of our ego
rather than to eternal hands.

All around the divine leaves
each vivid repository of manna's presence.
Earth and creatures
exist in God's cradle of love
that he graces
silently
by his constantly turning
each cycle of sustenance.

How we can learn
from a simple gaze
at the way through nature
he has feed so many.

For the beasts who never
punch a time clock
are not forgotten by his compassion.

They reach towards his banquet table
never asking why or where
it will be served.

Can our inner voice ever listen
and also embrace
where his kitchen resides
to give thanks for each entry
prepared just for us?

SAVORY

The wonderful flavor of life can truly be so tasty at times. Which makes one feel so good and alive.

It doesn't always happen with such joy and frequency as we would want. There are occasions when it is less than satisfying.

Those are when we must savor something that is painful. Yet sometimes that is necessary to help nudge us to some casserole for the soul that is truly satisfying.

Lately I have been going through some inner changes in my life in terms of my own feelings about myself and my life. It wasn't not necessarily a tasty moment to have to embrace what I had not necessarily accepted.

So for a while it was painful to finally toss away certain moods and thoughts, which were old friends, but honestly crippling to my well being. Yet, even though it was necessary, the process of change was not necessarily a pleasant change while it was happening.

Fortunately, for me, the Lord was longsuffering and his spirit was so gentle in the way he moved me to the place I needed to be. It was a long journey from that dungeon full of negative thoughts and darkness and into a place where I could accept change.

But God touched in a way that helped give me the strength to escape that sadness. It truly did take me to a point of understanding that truly did touch me in such a wonderful way.

There are times in life when one must suffer a given form of pain in order to move ahead in life. It can be difficult and challenging, but in the long a blessing.

We can lose sight of the blessing in the middle of our resistance. I've seen those who refused to grow.

That is what this is all about. The times when God for our own good helps to guide us to the point to see us flower.

Sadly, to not bloom means you wither. The heart will shrivel and be less fruitful. As for me, well I do savor the change.

It comes at a time of general transition that does give me joy. I look back feel the happiness that I don't have to endure the shadows any longer.

That will always give me pause to celebrate God's grace. It isn't always a moment when one is prepared to see what is best.

But if we listen and obey we will find the end of shadows where live never truly thrive. And then we can honestly begin to live.

POWER GIFTS

The New Testament speaks of believers being "gifted" by the holy spirit. They are the ways God's spirit works through believers to serve the Lord's purposes.

I think the important part is that one understands these are not a reward. And they are what we experience from the Lord as a personal blessing that has no other purpose.

It can be such a challenge to keep clear in one's mind their purpose. And also to keep focused on obedience, which can be tough if it means accepting God's will in terms of anointing.

The one problem is with those who decide you can only serve God as a pastor. To them that is the dream calling of a Christian. They can see themselves truly serving God unless it is as a pastor.

Of course, if God doesn't call them to such an office then sometimes they will still decide that is what they are supposed to do. So the heart takes charge and the mind goes on vacation.

Which really never ends up being a good thing. And the casualty rate for such choices is always very high.

I remember this one person I knew who had decided being a pastor was the way God was calling. I have to admit there was nothing about this person that remotely suggested that being a pastor would have been God's choice.

I appreciate that the Lord can call anyone that he wants to that office. It doesn't matter are talents, what is important is that the Lord's spirit empowers.

However, I do feel that when one is called to such offices there are some fairly obvious hints that it is the Lord's doing. Not always, but I think it is true most of the time.

In this case, the person was at best, a very poor bible student, has no social skills and spoke so slowly that it would easily put one to sleep. I just couldn't image the person ever preaching in a way that kept people's attention.

As for ministering to people, well it might have been nice if the individual had some capacity to be outgoing or express concern for others. It was obvious from what I could tell.

I did feel bad for the person though. For this was an all or nothing choice. Like if I don't get what I want, then forget it!

At least that was the attitude that was conveyed. Which is never one that gets the Lord's attention in a good way.

Such is the nature of when we let our desire take charge over God's will.

HEALTH

Is being healthy the same as being wise? I'm not inclined to think so. Being fit is a wise choice, but if you have zero body fat and act totally stupid that is not a good thing.

Instead, one does need balance. And that is not always easy to obtain in life. We can have one type of health in our lives and totally be messed up a different way.

How said it is that one presumes one form of health means all aspects of health are present. It is a stereotype that hurts so many.

The most obvious forms of health often get our attention. It doesn't mean we necessarily deal with them, but we know about them just the same.

Oh we might ignore things like eating right or ways to avoid stress. We may even neglect dealing with certain aspects of mental health when we have some obsession.

Doing any of those naturally doesn't improve our live. We just feel it ache in different ways. Always trying to do our best to pretend we don't have a problem.

Some people spend their whole lives behaving such ways. They never one reaches a point of having to face the truth that their lies to themselves are less than helpful.

What is even sadder is when this occurs on a spiritual level. Soul sickness is as detrimental in so many ways as any other forms of health problems.

But it is so much easier to forget and ignore. That is the part that really is sad. Because it is so easy to avoid at times.

God will not force us to take any spiritual medicine. We can willingly not accept his remedy.

Oh we will suffer from that process. We will truly never find the peace inside that eludes when we don't listen to what God is telling us.

Some try the do it yourself form of spiritual medicine. They will seek out a clinic to attend. They never ask God in the process or worry about if it really helps with the healing process.

It is just a case of, good enough. So they march in on Sunday and feel totally content with the idea they have taken their medicine for another weekly dose.

Okay it didn't really taste that good. They don't feel any different, but they swallowed it. And next week they will do the same.

It will always be the routine when you depend upon a doctor without using Heaven's referral system.

TRINITY'S CLASHES

Deep in the chasms of bleeding, luminescent sarcophagus
where the scribes of our essence chant their secrets
the tethers to reality fray
binding the mind, body and soul.

Spirit ascends to lofty layers while sewn to earthen facets,
brain begets its throated passions, visions steam in fancy's tea pot,
flesh obeys as servant to king pulse,
all working in rhythm to a sun's stop watch.

Inward the ghosts of our stumbling resolutions
weave festoons of Nirvana and Hades into the sandman's litter box.

Between the pillars of conscience
erected to keep the crumbling house of sanity
from suffering dementia's earthquake
one strolls as a mirror enigma
calling out for help with mime language.

Hoping to find a maze with a map
that doesn't lead to another halo dungeon
where the screams from our triune essence are soften
by the death groans of our mortality.

SICKNESS

There are some who insist that sickness is the consequence of sin. A divine punish ordained for having done something wrong.

It is true that sickness can be the consequence of sin, but that is not a general rule for all sickness. The same can be said for such things as having handicaps and other infirmities.

To me it is so cruel to sit back and casual observe in such a callous manner that somebody is suffering from birth as a punishment. I do wonder if such people would feel the same if they were inflicted with a handicap as being born without vision or hearing.

We understand that so many things in life are influenced by elements we can always control. There are just so many causes and effects that impact our lives.

God often doesn't interfere with the natural course of events. He won't prevent things from unfolding that come from our choices and the way cycles of life impacts each of us.

What we face at the challenge of dealing with any of the obstacles in life. They are never equitable or fair. Nor are the in any way ones we get to pick and choose.

Our choice lies in how we choose to embrace them. What we do that will let us face life in a way that lets us accept our burdens and not deny them.

For the person of faith, this is a time where we look to the Lord for strength. We do not abandoned the acceptance of God's reality just because things don't go the way we desire.

It can be difficult when struggling with issues such as how often we try to do right and it end up suffering for our efforts. That can be so discouraging. And we can feel the need to think it is all unfair and annoying.

What can really upset too if you see somebody who totally ignores God end up prospering. That really sucks the energy out of the spirit.

It is so easy to fall into a chasm of depression and feel it is all unfair. If one allows such thoughts to fester too much it becomes so tempting to start wondering if God even cares.

But the true is that life is not measure by this time frame. It is based upon eternity and the whole expanse of history.

We might not feel it is not enough when we are suffering. And the longer we live without the answers we need, the more it can be difficult to accept the Lord's reality.

Which is all part of the challenge of faith. To see without seeing. Know while the facts of now claiming something else is true.

It is all part of the walk of faith we have to embrace as he leads.

PROMISES

Words are like a river, they gush forth into streams of promises, lies and all the other rivulets of thought that flood our minds. And most of the time, we never really know for sure how such things always water the feeling of other.

There are just too many times it is other than what we expect or want. And how easy it is for our words to end up drenching in a way other than we want or desire.

It all is part of the problem that comes under that predictable term of communication. We all talk about it being important, but somehow in the practical demands of every day words it just gets lost at times.

There are always two parts to the river of words. The one where the words flow and the other where they are received.

And if one of those isn't working right then what happens is less than correct or true. But the mind seldom behaves as we want. So we end up in the process of something other than pure dialogue.

All of which leads to confusion and misunderstanding. Which seldom ends in a positive result.

Somehow despite it all life does manage to function. It is truly does get snarled at times in a wasteland where the only thing that happens is finger pointing. Which never results in good consequences.

The flaws of thought and expression run deep in life. We can always find them other than what blesses.

Fortunately, God is aware of this fact. He isn't likely to let it keep him from accomplishing his purposes.

To the untrained eye things like the Bible can't possible convey anything perfectly if man had touched it. Likewise those who preach and teach God's word will be vulnerable to the same communication problems as anyone.

Yet, God still uses teachers and pastors to communicate his word. And even though it has been put in some many different languages, we also know how in the process various languages will have different ways of saying something.

It can be a source for some of claiming that you can't really know the truth in the process. All of which discounts the power of God's spirit to influence people.

For with the Lord he can touch in so many ways other than the ways we assume he should communicate. Which is perhaps the great blessing of all that God can and do make sure truth prevails.

THEMES

Let fly the burnished gaze
when eyelids flutter just before the mind's dawn
that awakens such awe and mystery
in the coffee cup moments
life becomes a microscope of visions.

Peace is the writer's envy
because it only comes
through a flurry in fixations
eyes blocking sunlight
to delve in deepening textures
what the sun truly shines.

Magic spews in musing quill strokes
as one grasps at airy metaphor straws,
sucking them dry of meaning.

Inside the heart floats in sensuous tank
swirling with the colors of the soul,
painting them from memory
because one saw
amid the tinsel and glow
a face needing attention.

Carried by the melody inspired
seeing its harmony in earth's banquet,
tranquility only comes
from passing on the luster felt as pure golden ecstasy
unto those who can't touch the sky.

TIRED

Who doesn't feel this way at times? I can't imagine any of us who never has some time in life when we feel a lack of energy.

Weariness of the heart is harder to understand perhaps that other types. For that is dictated by moods rather than anything else.

When we are depressed life just never seems to be able to touch us in a good way. We can seem to muster the desire to actually face life's challenges.

I find this happens to me a lot when I have to say do my daily exercises. I do them enough that physically I am in a position where they drain, but never totally wipe me out.

But if I'm depressed, I just don't have the emotional energy to want to do my best. I don't give up though.

I always resolve to finish that day regardless of how I feel emotionally. It can be a challenge to be sure.

But I have learned that if I'm feeling down, quitting only makes things worse. It just really contributes to the feelings of sadness and depression.

Rolling around in my brain is the awareness that naturally I have also being doing this for the Lord. If it was just for me, I probably wouldn't mine as much, but it runs deeper than that.

There is just the abiding awareness of how there is more involved than my thoughts and needs. It is an act of trust to God to see me through the moment.

When I leave, tired and sweaty, I don't have any stories of which to boast. Not opportunities to tell about some victory.

There is only the calm joy of knowing I did what I needed to do. And that is enough for me. I feel the joy inside that carries me home.

Somehow it all quiets the storm inside. It may take a while, but I do eventually finding the darkness evaporating.

Never is sudden ways. Always in small manners that slowly lift the sadness. And for that I'm grateful.

God is there and I feel his gentle nudge upon my shoulder. It is enough to give me hope and calm for the remainder of the day.

I feel it inside where the ache thrives the most. And for that I am always grateful as a blessing that you can measure in dollars and cents.

NOW OR FORGET IT

Ever lose the present because you were more concerned with either the past or future? Really is the fact we have to deal with at times.

Doesn't always mean we end up losing the joy of now, just that it can get lost so easy while thinking in other terms. Which we need to savor in our own way.

Now is the conscious calling. It is the alarm clock droning in our head that says, we can't forget where we've been even if we have moved on.

So we savor where it leads and hope that will make for more smiles than envy. If we succeed then there is laughter.

Today is the banquet sure. It is all we can savor though me might dream of some appetizers or the restaurant we once visited.

But the heart still is trapped in the present, never able to leap past our current pulse to somewhere else. That is our inheritance of mortality

To drift by thought elsewhere is our often choice of release, but we can't thrive there only survive. Which can be a form of death in itself.

Sorry stabs when we tape ourselves into a closet of slow death. It is the passage we wander alone on a borrow ticket.

Never clings to our lives, never savors our mood with something full of jewels. It calls without calling, buries us underneath layers so fluid in swirling regret.

Calling upon the Lord to find the now that touches will always be the way, which serves. It is the way that heals.

We inhale the joy if we dare to see with open eyes. If we savor it that allows God's light to shine into our blinks of distraction.

Having the moment to rejoice. Having the smile to see where the clouds take us. Knowing where tomorrow rides, but no letting it consume us.

It all restores the life within. One heartbeat cherished so richly. We can rejoice instead of mourn.

All in arms of our savor. A place were dreams are enough to let us sleep in peace. Upon the wing of an angel who lets us fly with them.

Towards the dawn we can see jewels and gold. Never letting the other moments than now truly capture where we are. It is enough for the day. Enough for always if we take time to know what we have seen all along.

THEN

Wonderful at the times when we can reflect in calmness about some past storm. It can be so soothing to remember the moments when we thought our world was going to end and it didn't.

Time is so touching at helping us to at times rise above our sadness. Providing we learn from the valley. If we survive and learn nothing then it is a tragedy.

God's spirit can often grant us the capacity to see through the shadows. To be able to look at the darkness and truly understand.

Not everyone is able to do that. Some will always wallow in the sad location of being nothing, but blind.

They will eventually rise from one valley, but only to be able to find another and never actually appreciate what the valley is suppose to teach. Such is the sad nature of where life leads at times.

There is no life that is lived without that problem. We all travel from one moment to the next and it will include both mountains and valleys.

It can't be escaped. Just traveled. We can do it with the Lord's help or without it. If we embrace his guidance then we find ourselves seeing clearly.

How often the joy of blindfolds does prevail though. There are occasions when we just enjoy the opportunity to not look at the valleys.

What is sad is when we spent a life time in such blindness. Just accepting the view of what is real that makes us happy.

That doesn't mean it is healthy. Nor does it mean that the person will ever change. Until there is a collision with reality.

How often we plant those seeds of denial in life. Growing a nice thriving garden where everything looks wonderful and scenic.

If you don't look to close then it is fine. The world is perfect and our little plot is ideal. However that can change at a heartbeat.

It doesn't take much. Just a little storm to upturn the plants of illusion that have such shallow roots.

Then we can move ahead, providing we don't replant them. Some will spend forever in that chore.

Others will learn as god intended. For which we can be grateful if we get a passing grade.

THE CREVICES OF TEARS

Lines of fluid lament
flow their trail in agony's toxins
from the eyes,
through the heart,
flooding the soul.

Unspoken ache of longing
is felt so deep in the emptiness
where an absence's darkness
creates a crack in one's thinking
in which you fall
being so completely devastated
from a sense of utterly aloneness,
shrouded in a mourner's garb
for the death of self esteem
and knowing not a single other hand
cares if you live or die.

It is a pain rippling in intense waves
rising from that endless sea of despair
where the sunken sinks of your dreams
lie submerged in sorrow's soggy chest.

About to drown,
unable to even shout a single cry for help
when someone reaches out with a life preserver of love
so you can ride that current of solitude
knowing how you're not truly alone
as long as another life carries your's inside.

PASTING

Ah the fun in life of gluing some fantasy onto our reality. Just by passing the facts and sticking onto the truth whatever tale we think will work.

This is all less than helpful in life as far as coping with you actually face. But it does make for a nice distraction. Tell the day comes when your layaway of the facts has a bill that has to be paid. Then it really can hurt.

The last couple of weeks I was forced to deal with a person who was doing this wonderful job of presenting life as being lived in a certain life. There were a number of facts left out that version understandably.

Which was fine till I ended up learning the truth. That included discovering this person was inclined to being very deceptive and not admit to true motives.

All of which resulted in the sad situation where this individual was masking certain selfish motives. Not that this is anything unusual. Just that in this case, the person was so wrapped in the garment of denial that there was no way for the individual to admit in any way what was wrong.

Complicating this was having the person resort to quoting scripture. Naturally this was done out of context. And that hardly improved anything.

How sad it is when people become so blind on purpose. Living in the delusion of being good and thus never really seeing the truth or accepting the sin that abides.

As a result there can be no change or improvement. Which isn't a tragedy by itself. However if this denial is involved with a given sin that goes denied there can be consequences.

Such is the said nature of this kind of behavior. It always ends up with being something other than helpful in the long run.

And the more the person actually is involved in deception of a sin, when they intrude in God's will, the individual can risk consequences. Such in the nature of what people often ignore.

Adding to the problem is the fact that often God will not force the person to face that kind of problem immediately. He may tarry a while for them to think they are safe.

Later they will end up facing the truth. In a most disastrous manner. It can be so crushing to some.

Sadly, if such consequences never get the message across to the person then you end up finding out the hard way how going against the Lord's will can be so devastating. Too bad people don't always get that message later.