MYTHS

Hocus pocus
a curl and swirl
from truth
to pardonable sins.
Let us
approve
the mask
with its
festive,
festooned
pristine
image.
For kings and heroes
are both created
inside our mind.
And with enough
word magic
they even
become
nearly divine.

PASSAGES BEYOND

There are journeys of faith that reach a known or given horizon. When you reach that point where what you are trusting God for becomes fulfilled you know that trip has ended. Where it ends with a happy ending or heart ache you still know when it is over.

What lingers in the mind is when you reach what you thought was the end of a journey and it turns out that instead you find a gate. Beyond it lies uncertainty, sometimes fear or other times another potential place of promise.

It is like a journey with a detour. You started out assuming you knew God’s will and how the trip should end, but when you reach the point of conclusion you find the journey is often one that just begun.

For example, such as when I went back to college. I went specifically because I assumed that I was preparing to study for a ministry of religious education. I did graduate, but didn’t end up actually pursuing that ministry for a variety of reasons. Basically the doors closed.

However my college experience exposed me to the rigors and inclinations in writing. It was the seedbed from which my own fruit of creation would eventually grow. And so now, years later, instead of working in religious education say as a minister of education in some church, I spend my time writing various forms of spiritual writing that are read by far more people than I might ever have encountered in some church.

Do I rejoice over this unexpected detour? No, not really. I do celebrate with a degree of awe the incredible power God has to bring us to that point to serve him according to his desires instead of what we assume is our calling.

The hard part is getting passed the gate. In my case it was nearly two years from the time I graduated before I actually began pursuing writing seriously as a result of a vision I had.

Those two years were long and full of doubts. I sat back on more than one occasion feeling utterly confused over why the journey had been taken in the first place.

God didn’t shine forth some ray of assurance from the heavens to explain my wandering in that period. He didn’t give me any clue that there was something yet to come.

So I waited and prayed and kept believing that there was some point of relevance that would become understandable in due time. And I must confess that moment of vision, which was my gate to the passage beyond was an experience that will always be fresh in my mind.

I share this in hopes it will encourage someone else who might have reach such a gate in their live and only have questions. Rejoice in knowing that God will open that gate in due season. In the meantime, the call is to keep trusting. I pray we always listen.

TENDER AND FINE

Drift along the shore of happy where the roses of our hopes and dreams thrive. Reach and touch the stars that are nestled in the spirit. Create a galaxy among the pillars of what is known. Then sit back and ignore the bleeding from the thorns of emotional egress that clipped one’s wings of fantasy because one cut by the scissors of criticism.

Life so often seems to reside in the realm of other than the ideal. How do we cope when that becomes a steady diet as mental and spiritual staple? Some might never even grasp that question, but I think it merits being asked.

For the sake of clarity my journey in that sense as mention above is to allow for the ramblings that aren’t affixed to any dependable philosophy. They come from that tender and sensitive side of one’s soul. And if one is prone to being uncomfortable with that element of our deeper layers of presence then such tenderness can be traumatizing.

I’ve seen the people who often refuse to visit those layers and discover what the mind tries to keep secret from our own awareness as a defense mechanism. So they hide and in the process truly become soul sick. On the surface they remain careful to maintain a calm façade, but the undercurrent of turmoil from the lack of honesty truly does take its toll.

The Lord often must bring us beyond any shell of illusion in strength to that revelation of our inner tenderness before we can become mature in terms of relationship with him. We simply will never find balance or know the type of peace that comes from such clarity without surrendering to that mirror moment.

All of this is independent of what the physical plain of reality lashes against our lives. Some don’t appreciate the individual aspect of this process. They entwine both spirit and mind with the body in such a way that it can end up being confusing to their ability to discover the deeper revelations.

It is amazing to me how many followers of the Lord I encounter that never rise beyond the preoccupation with the demands of this life. Even though it is, but a heartbeat away from being a memory when we reach eternity it still consumes to often.

In the shouting and chaos of self-absorbed races we can easily become so blind to what we should see the most. To find the Lord in the midst of the physical realm is a journey of insight that is far more touching than when we try to improvise such relevant interpretations. Meaning, it is so easy to only see the sun and daylight, when we should be looked for the SON. He is the light of life, but when what we only know are the rays of now how can we ever be warmed and feel fine in the process.

Perhaps this is more of a rambling collection of thoughts to some. But I trust to the lord that his spirit will use this as a moment of helping to lead some to the plateau of fine that is our spiritual inheritance. Hopefully, we don’t lose it in the taxing of worry over this life.

WEAKNESS, MEEKNESS AND SEEN

Not all strength is a blessing, not all weakness is a curse. And no matter how we are seen by the world, what God sees will prevail in eternity.

Weakness is normally not considered an attribute. We admire people who like our heroes are courageous and have the power to defeat their enemies.

A few years ago there was a movie made called the “Last Temptation of Christ.” It was based upon a novel that a man wrote where he was trying to portray the human side of Jesus. In his effort to show the humanity of Christ he ended up inserting the idea of Jesus have this erotic and lustful thought about Mary Magdalene.

When it was made into a movie numerous Christian groups were outrage that anyone would portray Jesus in such a manner. And many ended up demanding protests to the film. Not to surprising the film did get some good reviews by movie critics. I wont attempt to comment on the possible significance of that point of view.

I myself did attempt to wade through the movie when it came out on video just to see what all the controversy was about. The first time I tried to watch it I have to admit I wasn’t offend as much as I was hopelessly bored by the story line.

Then somebody I knew claimed the movie did get better later. So I sat down and attempted it a second time. As a writer the one thing that struck me the most was that the way they depicted Jesus in the movie made him from my point of view appear as a very flawed and weak person.

That was perhaps the movie directors over use of creative license, but I just kept watching and asking myself would somebody that flawed and weak honestly end up being worshipped? It just seemed like a very unlikely scenario for anyone who was going to be regarded as a hero, let alone for the one who we as Christians regard as Lord and Savior.

I personally know I am no true pillar of courage or strength and I am grateful that the Lord in his grace still finds place in his kingdom and forgiveness to grant me a chance to follow him. And in that sense I have learned, strong or weak, that meekness as it is meant to be understood as having one’s desires under influence to the power of the holy spirit is part of how God does work in our lives. That kind of meekness is like a wild horse being tamed. It isn’t that absence of spirit, just having it channeled in the right direction.

I’ve seen too many who were too afraid to admit to some weakness or even that they sinned. Oh they claim to believe in salvation by faith, but the one they that will never happened is that they will admit to doing anything wrong. For them the weakness of fear stemming from a need for control and pride will always deny them the simple joy of being truly honest. They will live in the shadows and let the darkness of their own lies prevent them from ever becoming meek by God’s standard. And that is the one place it truly will be seen for the weakness it really is.

LOST IN SPACE

By the light of the moon
my body convulses
from being electrocuted with terror.

For one more merciless and torturous eve
the demons of my failings
feast upon my crippling ache in despair.

They stir their vile cauldron
polluted with guilt’s putrid scent
that so utterly suffocates my bedroom’s lair.

Hellish agony from their torment
causes my gut to boil with shame,
infecting my soul
till it groans in a silent, plaintive prayer
and frantically calls upon my savior’s precious name.

Like a feather
being gently lifted by a breeze
each word floats upwards
unto the immense darkness of cosmic air.

Revealing a narrow path
between the clouds of thought and fear
which points the way to a piercing starry sight
shining with my Lord’s precious saving light.

It beams back at me from his unseen, loving face
bursting forth as a redemptive silvery aura
allowing me to truly inhale
his compassionate balm of grace.

Ever blissfully rejoicing in my forgiveness,
having at last discovered a sleep without screams,
I sail through a vibrant universe of spiritual dreams
so replete with the splendor of God’s creative lace.

Henceforth, I serenely caress images
beyond this world of woes,
enraptured and enthralled,
totally surrendered to my faith's journey -
lost in space.

DAYS GONE BY

Nostalgia rips most at me during those times of utter regret. Those are the moments when you reach the mid point of some valley and look back and wonder why the trip was necessary in the first place.

At present my wife and I are in the middle of a very long and difficult valley. Sadly it started out as what we thought was going to be a very unexpected blessing. Now it is lingering in a wasteland of confusion and uncertainty. What is adding to the stress is knowing that in the end this valley may not only end with sadness and heartache, but with and added burden.

It would be impossible to reach this point and not feel exasperated by why we had to endure this valley. For us a presumed blessing turned into a burden in no way is a welcome detour.

How often we have looked back in our lives to other occasions when we were the victims of some evil or sin. And it has always been a source of extra pain that no only is there never an upside to the valley in terms of a happy ending, but those who caused us the pain never seem to end up suffering in the process.

If one is honest you can’t go through such heartache and see the person responsible for the evil go unpunished and not wonder where is the Lord? A thousand riddles of why sing in the soul and mind. Countless are the questioned lifted up to which only the wind is the reply. It leave one wounded to the core, emotionally destitute and ill equipped to attempt to expect a better horizon in some future moment.

I wish I had the insights to share a sensible explanation for why such things happen to so many people besides my wife and I. From the scriptures my own home and assurance of God that “the just shall life by faith.” It does say, the just shall life a perfect and prosperous life. It doesn’t even say the just will life a happy life. Only those who are redeemed or justified in the Lord’s eyes will life by faith.

I believe in a just God. I believe in a loving Savior named Jesus Christ. But I know he will not dry all out tears until we are in his presence. How many people I’ve known in this life that have prospered in their evil. I’ve also known too many who harmed others and lied about it to avoid facing the guilt of their sin.

I do know that when standing before God such lies will not avail them. They may have the delusion of their blessings in this life. But it will hardly be a comfort in eternity if it has come at the price of the crown of salvation.

Those might be trite words in the eyes of some. I cling to them for the only source of comfort I can find as solace when the moments of sorrow rain on the soul like a storm. I pray for God’s strength not to take away all the heartache, but to grant me the peace of enduring. Along the way I will always pray to that he will grant us the mercy too of a life with more that sadness. Regardless of the weather as long as our Savior’s light touches our souls we won’t be left to merely feel of the affects of storms.

FRUIT

I think over the last few years I’ve learned to appreciate fruit a lot more than I ever did in the past. Finding out I was a diabetic made me change my priorities in terms of eating. One of those changes was to switch from candy and other forms of processed sugar to fruit.

I had enjoyed fruit to a certain degree before I found out I had diabetes, but it is a whole different matter when it is your ONLY choice in terms of sugar. Yet I have been grateful to the Lord that he has made it something I’ve learned to enjoy as opposed to always craving chocolate, ice cream and such.

On a spiritual level the concept of fruit in the scriptures is associated with results of our faith and obedience to the Lord. We produce the fruit of our calling that others can use for their own spiritual nutrition.

I can’t begin to reflect upon how many sermons I’ve heard about the important of Christians bearing fruit. And there is also the mention of the Fruit of the Spirit. That of course is related to the fruit that we experience in our soul as a result of the Holy Spirit being in our lives. There is mention of such things as love, joy and peace among others.

What I wonder about is how many times we seek or have more of an appetite for the candy of this life for our “fix” of things like love, joy and peace or the others fruit of the Spirit? I think it is a fair question.

And I think just as there is natural fruit verses man’s version in candy, so with the fruit of the spirit there are always the man-made versions. Yet perhaps just a natural fruit is far better for our bodies on a nutritional level so then the fruit of the Holy Spirit are more nutritional for our spiritual well being than any man made versions.

I think Satan is aware of this and how enduring the real fruit of the Spirit can be to a soul. Which is why he does inspire so many artificial means. It is such a deceptive lure that works in getting us to snack on some quick fix of emotion and convince ourselves it will last as opposed to seeking God’s real fruit.

Sadly, there are houses of worship where I think at times they really try to blend too much of the artificial fruit into the pure taste of God’s fruit. A dash of humanism, some seasoning of prosperity to fuel the taste buds of the soul for more and pretty soon the real fruit sort of gets forgotten.

It is time upon occasion to take a moment and visit God’s garden of reflection and enjoy the fruit of his trees. Isn’t is interesting that in the Garden of Eden that fruit had both the power to give life and also knowledge. One was a blessing the other a curse. Yet just like with artificial fruit how many times do we choose the wrong kind of fruit in our own lives? I’m not accusing, just pointing it out for a point of thought. May we all savor the taste of the fruit of the spirit more than the candy of this life.

THE SOUL'S CARPET

The true covering
for the soul’s
house
is a pure fiber
of facts.
Truth
woven by God,
so defining
and revealing.
But it is hard
to stroll
across this
layer of veracity
wearing sandals
made from a logic
hopelessly worn out
with holes.
Some people
succeed
by jumping to conclusions.

TRIALS UPON THE SHOULDERS

I wish there was a way to avoid these situations in life, but no matter who we are life will always have some kind of challenge. I have a feeling it doesn’t take most of us very long to figure that part out. Nor does it take long to find out that life isn’t necessarily a system where rewards and punishment are based up you getting what you deserve.

Such inequity is a reality that has stirred many over the unfairness of life and drives a person in many directions. Some turn to God, others to something else for answers. Yet no matter where we turn, it doesn’t spare us from that circumstantial grind.

So we end up, don’t we, on settling for the foundation of strength that helps get us through a day. If it works in our mind then that is what we will lean upon regardless of how somebody else views it.

On a spiritual level, it is sad when Christian falls under the “settle for” category. It just seems to lose the luster of sincerity and passion when it is something you accept for any reason that genuine faith and desire. The absence of a real relationship with our Lord and Savior and simply having made a choice for other reason never seems to provide satisfaction from what I’ve noticed.

Last night I was sitting at my computer when somebody knocked on my door. This wasn’t a simple tapping. It was more like the police pounding on my door before they were planning a raid.

Well, I turned on the porch light and check through the front door peephole. It wasn’t the cops. And the man didn’t look particularly threatening so I opened the door.

As it turned out he was going door to door and passing out flyers about the church he attended. No problem for me.

The only thing though was I didn’t detect any joy in his actions. His face was hard, his eyes stern and cold. When he asked me about being a Christian it was more as if he was grilling me for answers instead of simply asking a question. I didn’t detect any happiness in his spirit over what he was doing.

Perhaps he was just preparing himself for a negative reaction. That can happen so easily when you are talking to people about Jesus.

Still, after I told him I was a Christian, there was no reaction of relief or even a smile of joy that he had met another brother in the lord. Instead he was grimaced and apparently disappointed that he didn’t have a chance to engage in a battle for conversation. So even though I wished for him the “Lord’s blessings,” he turned and walked way without another comment.

Maybe life does carry burdens. But at the core I think we too create some of our own. I pray we don’t let it turn out relationship with the Lord into some cold and lifeless troubling stone!

SLEEPING

There is the rest for the body and then there is the rest for the soul. What resting for the soul is to me is the time we let it breath with a wind of spiritual refreshment. It is to relax the thoughts and essence from all the distractions and let the soul truly be the focus point of a given moment.

Some might call that contemplation others part of the act of worship, but the problem is those occasion such as during fellowship often ensnare with rituals and our created list of “must do.” We can easily get consumed in dozens of distracting thoughts, which lead to emotions that involve our body in the process.

Sleeping on a spiritual level in terms of relaxation to me is more an issue of exhaling all the chaos that might confuse and take us in the wrong direction. It is to allow God’s spirit to be the serenade of our moment. In short, it is to from my view lift our awareness of the moment to what God wants us to see and think about.

That isn’t as easy some might think. We can regard ourselves as practiced at such activities, but how many times do we often end up in other worlds of our own creation rather than the doorway to heaven?

It might seem like a picky point of view. But I just see it so often. All the striving to find the spiritual harmony. All the haste and activity that takes place that keeps our eyes blinded to God’s revealing light.

One of my activities during the week is attending a bible study. I always find it fascinating how often the conversation drifts to everything, but the bible or anything spiritual.

This isn’t intended as a criticism. Just an observation that what isn’t a priority is to refresh the part of one’s essence that you would presume should benefit the most from the process.

There is a lot of talk about the problems of life the endless burdens each person must carry and the sharing of experiences that people feel is important. Little or no time is spent really reflecting or simply taking time out of analyzing things to listen, genuinely listen to the voice of God. (I’m afraid at times if we did that the response might be mainly to tell us to shut up for a change.)

We drift on our islands of consciousness across the endless sea of NOW. Sometimes we look up to see the clouds others we think about them. But so often we never listen because it doesn’t occur to us that they can speak to our spiritual ears. The clouds being a symbol of course for more than this life.

May the light of pure reflection warm. May God’s truth be preeminent in all things. And may be seek to know what truly shines within with a sleep that will refresh instead of make us chase what will we never catch.

PRAYERFUL

The scriptures make reference to praying without ceasing. It is very intimate idea in terms of one’s relationship with the Lord, but I doubt any of us would be able to nothing, but pray constantly.

I recall how by one tradition, James, the one said to be the brother of Jesus and head of the Jerusalem church was reputed to have spent so much time in prayer on his knees that he was nicknamed, “Camel Knees.” I have no idea if that was true or fiction, but it is an interesting image.

The question to me is really what is prayer? I think you could certainly get all kinds of opinions on that question, but in reality isn’t it the dialogue we lift up to the Lord? And does it have to be a formal “Dear Lord…” type of dialogue?

I have this one friend who is a believer and is constantly going through this roller coaster of spiritual experiences. At one point the person decide to “lecture” me on the importance of prayer. The person never even asked about my style of prayer, but had decided that real pray was a constantly dialogue with the Lord where you didn’t do anything and I mean anything without praying first. I do recall a few weeks later when I spoke to the person that this was no longer mentioned so I think the flame of enthusiasm had been exhausted by that point.

To me, I know that God knows our heart and thoughts. I think of prayerful as more than sitting down and lifting up some formal prayer. If we have a relationship with our lord, then pray to me includes those moments when we manage to see him in whatever we are doing. For isn’t the essence of prayer when we are communicating and wouldn’t keeping the Lord foremost in our minds be part of that situation.

What amazes me is they way some people want to use praying in public as a form of showing off. It is their way of showing off or at least it can be the motivation.

And there are other people who honestly feel very uncomfortable saying a prayer in a public setting. I think it is sometimes hinted that such people are “spiritual” enough. Yet, where is it written that we all are possessed of the gift of speaking in public.

Plus the other thing I find interesting is how a person can one second be venting in some sinful manner and the next praying as if they never had a bad thought. It is as if they are so spiritual that the Lord doesn’t see their carnal side. And sadly you never hear such people utter a single word of humility or praise for forgiveness in their prayers. Oh they might utter some comment about others needing such qualities, but never themselves.

Prayerful to me is the way of the faith that flows naturally and isn’t forced. It respects that timing is something relevant to the sincerity of a prayer. That for me means not just doing something out of habit, but out of desire. Some will never graduate from thinking God’s ears can listen to more than our lips. They will always be victims of their spiritual prejudice. Hopefully we learn to pray always for the right reasons.

COMPROMISING GRACES

Life’s unexpected renewal
festers
in a jar
kept on a shelf
behind
a bag of jewels
that isn’t really
there.
But the mind
sets in a concrete
of expectations
the embryos of rules
to make rainbows and prisms
out of nightmares.
Somewhere
between the soul imprisoning deserts of excuses
and lucid forests of insight
flows the fount of God’s matchless reason,
which loving replenishes our emptiness
when we are busy chasing mirages.

LIFE AND DEATH

This morning I had gotten up and was leaving my apartment on the way to the gym when I noticed the pole that held the apartment complex’s American Flag was lying on the ground as was the flag. I noticed that there was also a smash flower pot nearby so I accepted the fact that someone had intentionally uprooted the pole and vandalized the pot.

Why, of course, I have no idea. But I do feel sad that some people apparently find it necessary to cause harm in such ways. It was hard to understand the state of mind or thinking that felt it was a good thing to show such disrespect to the American Flag.

I know it happens, but it doesn’t mean it gives me any pride to see how someone enjoying the fruits of freedom paid for with the blood of others that have no gratitude whatsoever for such sacrifices. My goal is not to wave the flag or make this about patriotism. Merely to reflect on the sadness of ever declining sense of values that seems to be a growing part of lives.

On a spiritual level I doubt that people prone to such despicable behavior are capable of grasping the reality of how the Lord views such behaviors. Such actions to me run to the core of one’s soul. They have a broader meaning in terms of expressing a deeper spirit of rebellion that is the fire resulting in such behavior.

Do I feel that this will improve in time? Only after the Lord comes. In the scriptures we are told that one of the signs of the end times will be that men’s “love” will grow cold. As values give way to indifference, as love is replaced by hate, as all that is sacred and worth caring no longer has life, but dies from a simple lack of passion in the soul, what we call and see as existence will face continue changes.

I doubt the person guilty for this incident will ever be found. Life is full of instances of the guilty escaping justice. However I also know that the Lord will always see such actions. And that such people truly live in a hell of their own creation.

I am comforted by the awareness that there is still love in the world. That not everyone is so inclined to act in such ways.

For me life will never be living if I die to what I know God thinks is important. I can’t say I can always obey his standards. However as long as I know the difference I can rejoice.

I also live for the wondrous time when the eternal and lasting will replace the chase for self. Then we who listened to the Lord’s spirit with our hearts shall join him with our souls.

In the meantime, we grief when live must be endured while evil finds a home and visits instead of dies. May as many as will listen celebrate that precious hope that Jesus will bring when he will make sure that nothing hidden won’t be revealed.

OF PREY AND PRAY

A quest
of the sun
in one’s soul
having as it
expected goal and tender
some bounty
equal
to our most cherish
secrets.
But to hunt
whether
using a tongue or a gun
feels
more justified perhaps
than when
using our lips
in hopes
stalking the scriptures
by petition
will yield Heaven’s game.

DIVINE

There is divine in the sense of that which represents God and then the type of divine that is “heavenly” in terms of our frame of reference. Although we probably might agree for example that food ISN’T suppose to be something that we worship or treat as fantastic (I’m saying in terms that we aren’t SUPPOSE to think that way, but generally do) it is interesting to me that there is one form of fudge called “Divinity.” Somebody obviously was thinking beyond it being just a food when it got its name. Which for me doesn’t even matter these days since being a diabetic I can’t eat candy anyway. So it would hardly be divine to me.

I was more drawn I think in this posting to the concept of what really constitutes “divine” in terms of our joys and what we regard as “heavenly?” Is it wrong to honestly feel euphoria over earthly pleasures? Can one truly be “spiritual” and at the same time have some obsession for this life?

The answer to that question completely depends upon whom you are asking. And to be honest I think in some cases the person will say it is okay just so they can justify some obsession or addiction.

I think the Apostle Paul gave some wonderful advice when he said, “all things are lawful.” However if one just took that comment as license and didn’t balance it with the other part “but not all things are profitable” then it would be other than balanced or true.

I have a hard time thinking God truly gave us emotions and desires and didn’t want us to satisfy them. But there are ways that enhance and edify and others that cripple and paralyze. That is a maze of motives too many of us easily walk into singing God’s praises to keep from dealing with the guilt of our selfishness.

I can’t forget the countless times in my life when I was involved in some church activity that was a lukewarm attempt to placate some passion or desire. You had entertainment for example, but it had to be “clean.” Meaning nothing erotic or the least bit sensuous.

Did it really satisfy? Was it in any way capable of producing that state of feeling in a way we would call divine? Not really.

I think God implants in us what the scriptures call our “hearts desires.” But we are encouraged to seek the kingdom of Heaven first and he will grant us our hearts desires. I believe that by seeking the kingdom of Heaven first we come to also see his revealing light. That will among other things shine upon our soul and open our eyes to what is truly our hearts desires and not what our brain thinks it is.

How many people miss that fact I can’t say. I do know that what becomes that sense of divine is never as natural or complete without God’s light shining into the darkness of our misunderstanding. Light a match of faith and watch it glow and with it will come the truth and all we really need to know!

RAPTURE

Probably for most bible students this word stirs certain apocalyptic or prophetic images. And while that is a very debated area of biblical studies it isn’t the type of rapture I was thinking about for this posting.

The emotion of rapture is one that is full of joy, euphoria from an almost intoxicating state of happiness. In short, it is an ecstasy you would never forget. The big question is how often have any of us experience it? Do we honestly have the opportunity in this life to know such emotion. And does it even matter if we do.

Several years ago I listen to this well respected Christian speaker who also taught sociology speak of the experience of truly being alive. For him he was speaking of what I think qualifies as rapture. This was that moment, no matter how long when even fiber of our being, from our mind to our senses is completely alive and experiencing an event. It utterly and completely strikes us to the core.

He said he had asked his students first how many of them knew what it was like to feel they were alive. What he got for a response was predictable and not very impressive. Then he redefined the idea of being alive by recounting how he remembered vividly one moment in his life when he stood on the roof of a tall building at night and overlooked a city. For one brief moment, his senses, mind and soul were totally consumed by the experience and he felt totally alive and would never forget the moment. That to me was a form of rapture. And as he confessed, that type of experience is truly rare in life.

The question I have is whether or not we have the right to expect that kind of rapture very often in life? I doubt there is any quota or law that spells out any limitations on such experiences. At the same time, at least by the definition provided by that professor mentioned in the previous paragraph I think few of us would say life reaches such a zenith of emotions on too many occasions.

In many ways I think on a spiritual level perhaps our expectations whether voiced or not do include a passing thought of how rapture should be included in our experiences with God. But does it really happen without being contrived, rehearsed or lie about.

I think the true born again experience where you feel the sudden overpowering presence of God in your life can be rapture. At least in some cases, but not all. Which I also believe is part of the problem. We are all different and the Lord knows that. Some people are and always will be very prone to controlling or subduing their emotions. Their personality simply will never lend itself to surrendering to such events for the require a certain release of you own control over you essence.

And I also know that even those who do seldom can honestly claim they happen very often. A sense of rapture can be so incredible when it happens, but I think on a spiritual level the purpose is to strengthen our faith. To grant us anchor of a given moment to help us during the tempest times of challenge that otherwise occur. If we seek the Lord and accept that as the value from such moments, then we can savor them for the right reasons. We will not let them produce the sin of spiritual pride or make them some form of soul narcotic that we crave for the pure rush. I pray we keep our hearts balanced to his desires over our own that our eyes will clearly know heaven from illusion.

BEGUILED

Probably for many believers the most familiar use of this word might be from the story about the fall of Adam and Eve and how the serpent “beguiled” them. It’s meaning is in such situations one of being deceived. But on a greater level it is more than simply coming to a false conclusion, it is to allow such misunderstandings to affect one’s actions.

That is the element, which takes a misunderstanding to the level where it can be more than something that affects our thinking. Yet there are times in our spiritual life that does happen.

Over the years I have heard some amazing things said by people who were followers of the Lord or claimed to be. Some were to say the least, really incredible and often not even close to being true.

To have an opinion and especially one based solely upon some prejudice is something that I’m sure affects many of us to some degree. It is when we act upon that opinion and especially when we know it isn’t true that we end up having actions that are less than helpful or loving.

The power of the holy spirit will often open our eyes to the truth. However, we can resist such true. And if we are feed some lie that appeals to our inner desires as Satan is so good at doing, we can simply grow deaf to the voice of he Lord.

What is equally sad is when we keep following such a path despite any warnings that God gives us. How often I have come to appreciate how easy it is for us to imperfectly understand the truth and to let our prejudice be inflamed in the process.

Knowing scripture doesn’t by itself prevent us from being sucked in by lies that appeal to that desire that truly dominates our soul. God, knows that desire and so does Satan. God will grant us insight and a positive way to cope with the desire. Satan will try to fuel it for the sake of corrupting us.

And amazingly I’ve seen how easy the most devout of faithful can be sidetracked by such lures of lies. Spiritual maturity doesn’t preclude being vulnerable. Which is why I think the Apostle Paul cautions us to work out our salvation with fear and trembling. For me that means never assuming or thinking we are beyond the point of being beguiled. It means not sitting back and allowing pride to fill us when we have some small or great victory. For pride truly at times opens the door to our soul that permits the temptation and beguiling to truly touch us the deepest.

Walk with pride in Jesus. Step by faith and never let go of the grasp of faith to admire one’s own hand. Take each step in the joy of only see God as sovereign and being grateful for his mercy that covers our sins even when we are beguiled. Looking back when trying to do so by pride will always end with a distorted vision. May we seek his sight to lead in the midst of any darkness that consumes who we are.

LESSONS

Life is full of moments intended to help us learn. Whether we accept such experiences as lessons is dependent, I think, upon our attitude.

With the usual variety or practical wisdom, there is often a commonality of benefit to appeal to our wisdom. We know for example that if we don’t check the oil in our car’s engine regularly we run the risk of it ruining motor. It doesn’t take any special magic to help us appreciate that kind of instruction.

And thus it is with some many elements of instruction that apply to this life. They do so often carry with them consequences that help to reinforce the wisdom of acting on the knowledge.

Sometimes though, we prefer to ignore the consequence for a variety of reasons. Oh we may lie to ourselves and decide we are the exception and won’t get caught or harmed in the process, but it doesn’t mean we will necessarily avoid such realities.

Thus it is so often that something related to desires fueled frequently by our sin nature that drives us to satisfy what we feel is a need even if there is a risk. And no matter how stupid it might seem in retrospect it doesn’t keep us from acting when we want something so bad nothing will scare us away from claiming it even if it might be harmful to us in the long run.

That is the nature of what all of us faces in life. And so often it seems to me that the consequences of often do come crashing down on our heads, bringing results that we regret. It doesn’t keep us from making the same mistake again at times no matter how much we wish it did.

On a spiritual level, however, lessons take on a different dimension. That is because they are related to faith. In this life you can ignore one type of lesson and still face a different one. But with the Lord, often if we don’t learn from our mistakes as he intends he would take us o a new level of challenge or faith.

For some they can sadly spend their entire lives facing the same lesson and never learn what is intended. There is a lot of discussion at times about the meaning of faith. It is to trust, which most of us understand. I’ve heard it said that it is also mainly about the courage to trust instead of quitting. I can’t say I necessarily feel that is completely accurate.

But what I do appreciate is how so often trust in God and his promises is related to the issue of surrender of self to God’s will. To accept his sovereignty over our own desires. That is a struggle so many find difficult to embrace at times. And it is the reason I think the Lord said he prefers obedience to sacrifice. So often I’ve seen people who said the had faith, but in reality when God reached into their hearts and tested them into what they valued most, they chose their own way. By that I mean they couldn’t stand to risk their reputations or personal security or whatever else was their own God when it came to learning the lesson that faith means putting the Lord before EVERYTHING else. That is a lesson I’ve seen many fail to learn. And you see the depletion of their spirituality in the process. Eventually they just become another pew sitter who never “gets it.” I pray we do the homework God gives us and find the truth as only he can teach.

ARISE

Arise
oh regent born
with a crown
forged by the ego
and pride.
Sit upon a dazzling throne
only visible
in one’s reflection.
For it is the monarch
we ordain
by sense
having our face,
but undressed and unadorned
until we claim
the kingdom
within.
Hopefully
our new awakened lord of self
will not summon
an executioner.

BECOMING

In the movies sometimes change seems to come so natural and easy. And the characters so often appear totally adjusted to such transitions. I’m generalizing I realize for there are movies that do a good job of depicting the trauma of becoming.

Regardless of the transition or obstacles, we all are aware that nothing ever stays the same. It doesn’t keep up from making plans or presuming upon life or even deciding we can control life. That is a wonderful illusion, just seldom it is really more than just an illusion.

For me there are various kinds of becoming. We are always in a start of evolving on so many levels. Some just never bring a balance to that kind of change. They focus on their careers, their families or whatever else is the lord of their lives.

On a spiritual level becoming is an incomplete process in this life. We will never become what we are destined to be in eternity. That is because we shall be spirit in this existence with all the many enhanced facets we can only speculate about in this life.

That is one of the inhibitors to knowing and truly becoming in terms of the Lord’s will for our lives. We can truly reach out into the vastness of eternity and full grasp what will adorn our lives.

When I have heard people attempt it they often end up giving it only a human frame of reference. By that I mean they think in terms of streets of gold, halos and any number of other “saintly” images that encumber our vision.

Being a writer I have lent my imagination to such thoughts, but I do know they are my thoughts and not fact. So I don’t pretend they are a complete revelation of that glorious time of life.

What I do know is that we are promise in Christ to have eternal life. Oh some might debate the fact that even the unredeemed have eternal life. But that is hardly a type of eternal life I would want to think waited in eternity.

For me the foundation of hope resides in he simple joy of understanding that becoming shall never be complete in this life. So I don’t view the path I take will following the Lord to be a place where I shall reach my place of having “arrived” in this life. Whatever I know, whatever I think I know, in this life I know it is a mere flicker of reality in terms of eternity.

Unto those who clamor for perfection in this life, who think they can become an unblemished saint while still breathing, they are entitled to chase their illusions. Meanwhile for those who understand that it is only when our hand touches that of our redeeming we will know what we were meant to become. I try to let that be my focus with each step. Sometimes I do better at accept that than others. But then there is always tomorrow.

AFTER DAWNS

The light of morning comes within the physical realm of thought like clockwork. So many times though it isn’t a harbinger of a given day’s events. Shadows can stalk from unexpected sources. Too many at times.

For the person who only sees with their eyes, they may miss out on the deeper significant of such events. A tragedy or crisis may only end up being viewed as just a crisis.

In the journey of faith confront such curtains in life can be an opportunity to experience the “after” dawn of enlightenment. It can lead to insights and understanding about life and god that we might not otherwise have understood.

Being guided by God’s spirit to always find that dawn is something that is easy to miss. We get so rushed in life and preoccupied with the routine and demands of a day to not notice when such light is being used of God to teach.

This perhaps is one form of dawn that is most often associated on a spiritual level with those who are called as Pastors or Teachers. It is part of their office to point to such dawns as a form of inspiration.

At least in part such dawns of new sight should bring inspiration. To gaze on what we looked at a hundred times and then for whatever reason we see it with new clarity is a blessing.

The one problem is that it doesn’t mean we always understand how another before us may have seen such dawns. They are very personal to us and that makes them special. However it doesn’t me they are only for us.

There are times when I encounter someone as a new believer who becomes excited of discovering some truth that others have know for ages. In their zeal they often want to tell others and that is understandable.

It is too bad though that instead of lecturing the person can ask. To question is to respect the opinion of others. To listen far more enhancing than just trying to preach.

But sadly the problem is one of being human. We become so dazzled by the brilliance of the new dawn that we just can’t help pointing it out to others.

So perhaps with time and thought we can learn to stop and ask God first when discovering such new dawns. To seek his wisdom in what to do with this light we see for the first time.

In the process we may even find a form of blessing we never imagined. And that makes the new dawn even more revealing and beneficial than we could ever expect.

Sight is a glorious thing. Seeing clearly is even more precious. Hopefully when it comes through a new dawn we will have the patience to look as God leads.

THE BRAKES

Dream stoppers plans
that plot to build mazes of madness
out of the “why’s”
they drill
from one’s soul
while lugging around
Paper Mache haloes and wing
as well as pretending
the cross they bought on credit
at an amusement park
is really from the Holy Land.
Claiming it was a gift
received from an angel.
but the real tale
remains untold.
it is a prayer
for vengeance
claimed as love
and uttered in phrases
of sixty-six words.

TOMORROW

For some reason whenever I think in terms of expectations for tomorrow my mind gravitates to one particular bible story. It was the one where Jesus spoke of the man who tore down his barns and then built bigger ones. After words he sat back and decide the rest of life would be easy. That tomorrow was going to be great since he had carefully planned out his future.

The only hitch was that God was going to require his soul that night. So all of his labors and all his planning were going to have no value to him. Maybe to the person inheriting his possessions, but not him.

Was Jesus honestly telling us that planning was a bad thing? I don’t think so. I believe the emphasis was suppose to be on appreciating the present is all we can truly count on for sure. That means on a spiritual level not being consumed with only the things of this life since we can only own them for a short period compared to reality.

A few months ago I had an occasion to spend time with a cousin who suffers from diabetes as I do. In my case, I have tried to deal with it as I felt the Lord wanted. My focused isn’t so much about health, even though I exercise and follow a strict diet. For me it is about obedience. I do those things because I honestly feel it is what God placed upon my heart to do in obedience to him. My reward if you want to call it that is simply the satisfaction of having done what I think he asked me to do.

I do think in terms of any health benefits in this life as such. Personally I don’t expect such things will sustain my life to any degree. Instead it for me is an act of faith. Doing it for no other reason than to be faithful. And it isn’t something that will be of importance in eternity. So I don’t see it as something to worship or regard beyond another duty of my life. For I know that God can easily take away my breath by so many means and I am also not immortal either. Thus it is yet another path of life I have to trod on my journey to eternity and that is enough for me.

With my cousin, he deals with his diabetes from what he said primarily for health reasons. He wants to live a long life and not have to reach his golden years with major health problems. His hope by his confession was to be able to have a few “good” years of living after he turned seventy.

The question that dogged my mind was “And then what?” Basically, even if you do live a few extra years, but in no way regard eternity or God in the process how will that benefit you after the grave? I didn’t get the impression he was too concern with answering that part of the question, which I don’t think is very surprising.

Tomorrow is a dream. It can be a fantasy or nightmare. That is dependent on what we choose to think. However, along the process of thinking about tomorrow can we answer the question, am I prepared to face God tonight if there is no tomorrow? The honest answer is probably no. Hopefully we shall pause in our haste and reflect on the one tomorrow in eternity that will some day come for everyone.

PRIMAL FOCUS

To see with the soul’s eyes is to know a horizon many never understand. It is to look passed the dazzle and frazzle of lies and sighs and towards the foundations of self. Only God can empower such vision. And it is amazing how often it eludes people, even those who claim to be followers of Christ.

Underneath the seen mantle we create with our hands and lips there is the crust of our heart. That soil of intent, which is where we plant our seeds of deepest desires.

True understanding that only comes with the light from God’s spirit can gaze through the extremities of pretense and discover the core of pulse that drives and motivates. It is a process that only truly works when one is seeking truth and not some other passion.

One can try to find out the facts in some cases just to affirm a prejudice. In biblical studies it is like searching the scriptures to find verses that support what you already believe. That is a quest grounding in selfish motives. It doesn’t seek truth as God would truly reveal it. Yet I’ve see it as the foundation too often with so many who feel the “know” what the bible actually says no matter how flawed their understanding.

It is so much harder to seek truth for the pure and simple sake of knowing. I’ve known so many people who claimed that was their desire, but when you hear them speak it is painfully clear they have other goals. Namely to satisfy whatever bias dominates their life as well as justify some action in their life that leaves them with a sense of guilt.

All of which to me comes down to having simply never pursued seeking the Lord above all else. For when God opens one’s eyes the look can be very painful at first. Gazing into his mirror of discovery and seeing the ugliness in our lives can be impossible for some.

But the real joy comes from the afterglow when God supplants that part of our image by showing us the good that often lies behind that ugliness. It is the beauty we miss out in the process of hiding from the dark and sinful stains in our lives.

This is a process that often requires a look through many layers. It means taking the time to lift one veil of deception at a time until we can finally see what is truly at the core.

God in his mercy will not force us to look too quickly when our eyes get strained from seeing the truth. He can grant us the grace to take time to see only what our heats can embrace in glances.

Some will never want to look that far into the truth. In eternity our perfect sight will never be able to not have that kind of primal focus. In this life is simply grants as that small stride towards a more sincere and honest relationship with our savior.

It is well worth the effort if one surrenders to letting God’s flame of revealing shine into where we dare not look. And there is always later when the temporary sting is replace by a better feeling of peace.

ECHOES AND MINIONS

The past never really dies in our memories. Sometimes the memories we wish would be forgotten seem to be the one’s we can honestly stop thinking about. They become like echoes that haunt us when some current experience reminds us of a past pain.

Naturally if one is a follower of Christ, Satan will find some minion of evil to do what he can to create such echoes. You don’t even have to be called to the office of pastor or some other significant role to experience that kind of attack.

One thing that to me always signals that such incidents are inspired by the devil is when one is a victim of hate for no obvious reason. I can’t begin to think of the times in my life when somebody went out of their way to cause me harm even when I had done literally nothing wrong to them. What is so amazing is how such people are so blinded by such unreasonable behavior they can’t even appreciate how such behavior is about the same as wearing a big symbol on their chest declaring, “THE DEVIL’S PROUD WORKER!”

That is how I feel about it at times. Honestly it is so aggravating at times to go through such moments, yet I know you can’t avoid them entirely either.

When it happens enough in your life it is natural to ask the obvious question “Why me?” I think it is a fair question. It is too bad that the answer isn’t as easy to come by as we might hope.

What I think the Lord has helped me to understand out of it is how, first of all this is not the end of life. Thus God has all eternity to wipe away our tears. And for me that is something I yearn for so much with the grief storms collect in my soul.

Secondly, because this life when one is following Christ belongs to him, he does have the right to use a person to try the hearts of men. Believe me I’ve sure found myself used for that purpose on many occasion. I wish I could say most people passed the test, but that wouldn’t be the truth. In most cases the person simply end up proving how some hate they never even admitted to truly did dominate their heart. A lot more than they ever would admit.

Imagine standing before God thinking you were so good and righteous and then he lifts up some soul you treated horribly and abusively and says, “How you treated this one of my children is the real proof of what resides in your heart.”

I’m not suggesting that any of us can avoid doing things that are wrong. And neither can we avoid at times causing others pain in all cases. But I do know when we have any conscience at all, God’s spirit can convict us of our failing. So sad is the person who never sees this truth or lies about it. For them the only place they will come to face it is in eternity. That is hardly a time I want to be the first time I find out when I was more a cause of the wrong kind of echoes than a source of hugs. Hopefully God will touch us all in ways we will listen when his echoes show us a better way.

AMONG THE RUINS

Rubble of sane,
become mounds
far too rich with blame.
Desperately searching
within the heap
for something redeemable
to truly reap.
Cause and rage
bury the tongue
under the weight
of unanswerable questions sung.
We utter prayers
while slumped over
and facing a corner.
Ever keeping the eyes closed
so the fire will our soul
continue to stain
while traveling the long, arid
desert
empty of acclaim.

HATE AND GREAT

How difficult it can be at times to cope with the issue of having confidence without allow it to turn into arrogance. That might not be so much trouble if we weren’t human, but because we are it does leave one vulnerable to allowing the good of confidence to be corrupted by sin.

When we get too distorted in our self image and we think the world or someone deprived us of our rights, we can easily grow angry. Which is what I think is Satan’s desire in some situations.

It becomes a battle to either suppress our sense of self worth so we lack the confidence to try and on the flip side to inflame our ego the point we think we are greater than we are. In both cases if it turns sour for whatever reason, hate can be the consequence. We can hate from resentment, we can hate from a sense of injustice. Most of all we end up just plain full of reason in our mind to be angry.

Injustice does rear its ugly head in life I wish it didn’t, but we wall face it to some degree. We can either deal with it in a positive way or negative way. And we can be sure Satan will do his part to twist our thinking to lean us in the wrong direction. He won’t even ask our permission.

This in no way makes God incapable of helping us in such situations. But that requires us to seek him for such help.

When the voice so lies from the father of lies burn in our head it can clog our soul’s willingness to listen for the truth. It can restrict our vision to see our what we think we are greater than we are.

In the end what gets sacrificed it the balance and endurance to deal with life as God’s spirit would lead. I’ve sadly seen in my own life and those of other followers of Christ when hate fuels a thought. Those are the truly sad times when Satan can get the best of any of us.

What is an even bigger problem is when that hate burns to the point it scorches our conscience. We can become consume with some distorted since of vengeance or feeling we have to right to take justice in our own hand. When that happens, hate becomes a blindfold that keeps us from being able to see the consequences of such action.

Naturally if it goes unchecked Satan will keep stirring the pot till we drift father and farther in rebellion against God and down a path of complete disobedience. In some cases it translates into seeing some mature “saint” so consumed with hate that they have not ability at all to remotely see the terrible truth of one’s actions.

It never ends with a real victory when hate is the driving flame. But to resist it even with all the pain we suffer is the one part of faith that can be the most taxing on one’s senses. What comfort me the most in the times of trials is knowing God never misses seeing every tear or the person who caused them. Sometimes that has to be the single promise we cling to. And I pray we never lose that grip by faith.

EXCEPT FOR THE GRACE OF GOD...

This is one of those statements I often hear as a comment of relief when seeing somebody else’s suffering. It is a confession of gratitude and praise for being remind how fragile life truly can be.

How many times I wonder though do we pass through a moment without such thoughts? We see the suffering or even suffer ourselves without this thought. Or it gets said without any really depth of true emotion.

I say this because it seems too often the real power of God’s grace eludes us at times. I ask how many times is it the basis of some sermon? How many pulpits emphasize grace as part of their ministry?

I honestly can’t answer it for all churches. But I know when I have listened to biblical teaching the word grace is most of the time absent from the message.

The apostle Paul never started a letter it seemed without extending grace to the readers. Jesus didn’t use the word when talking to the disciples for the most part. But his actions and compassion with them certainly were personifications of grace.

In reality isn’t grace, which is also known as unmerited favor, the embodiment of the purest form of love? That is the one God extends to us even though we don’t deserved it.

And thus at the core of grace it the mystery of God’s heart. That divine essence that extends out to us because he wants to and doesn’t has to. He could have created us as spiritual robots that did his bidding without thought. Instead he gave us a heart to follow its passions and a brain to choose, which ones would rule our lives.

Despite our failings, despite the times we disappoint him in our rebellion and selfishness, he still covers us with grace. He still contends with our soul and Jesus is still the lord over our all mankind, even those who reject him.

So there are times we can celebrate. Guilt too me that goes beyond its intended purpose is the absence of truly embracing grace. We should accept our failing and sadness should predictable follow if we have any conscience.

However, that doesn’t mean we necessarily treat it this way. Too many sermons seem far more concerned in telling us how to please God by avoiding some sin. By honoring him through living a life that we in reality will never achieve as sinners.

This happens instead of celebrate the mercy of grace. Instead of sitting down and simply being grateful that God doesn’t treat us as we treat each other. It is to surrender to following god through the valleys where we stumble and fall. It means getting up and starting over. It doesn’t mean saying “I’ll never do that again!” Someday perhaps the light of revelation of God’s grace will truly shine as intended. We can pray always to see it as it truly shines.

PASSAGES

In the quietness
between the wavering and shaky
pillars of presumptions
we travel
upon a limp carpet of illusionary
fibers
towards
the nirvana mirage
of our lusts.
Heaven’s cleansing rainbows
never
paint
all the layers in impulse
we have whitewashed
by our denial.
So we find
some cloud laughter
thundering with lies
to give us bent wings
till we awake.

YIELDING

Some people use their pride as a shield. Which is not always a bad thing. But there is a lot to be learn at times from accepting when we have areas of our life in need of improvement. Those that say things like “I don’t make mistakes” often risk missing out on such gems.

One of the problems with the life of faith is when God needs to make us face some problem in our lives that we can improve. So he will lead us into a crisis or situation to get our attention. If we yield to that leading we can come away with a gem or two of understanding and maybe even growth in the process. On some occasions it will even me the blessing of victory in the long run over a given problem.

But none of that happens when we are so full of pride and ego we can’t accept that kind of leading. We resist and as a result miss out on the treasure intended.

As a writer I participate at this one writer’s web site where one as a chance to showcase their talent in contests. Sometimes I win, sometimes I don’t. But along the way I do get the times when somebody will point out a place my effort needs work. And in some cases the person is honestly not that great a writer. However that doesn’t mean their point has no merit. So I have learned to listen and not let my pride keep me from trying to see the good in the comment.

Perhaps the greatest risk to any growth is when we think we know it all. If we have success we start having too much confidence in our own abilities. And if god blesses us as we trust him it can also end with us thinking we are mature and don’t have anything else to learn.

In such situations God can find a way to humble us for our own good. That doesn’t mean everyone responds as he wishes to such efforts. I’ve know some who in their failings spent the time pointing the finger at others instead of accepting their own shortcomings. They never learn the lesson. They never come to a point of yielding.

Not yielding in such situations merely ends up driving one farther away from God. It is sad because in the end instead of moving ahead in one’s relationship with the Lord one ends up slipping into the shadows of delusion.

God won’t keep us from such choices. And in time he will if we learn in such situations grant us the mercy of starting over. But it is always so much easier when we yield, accept the lumps of our mistakes and allow God to help us move on.

That is the joy that come after the tears. Outsiders may not even understand it at the time. But the heart will be the inner witness where God will strengthen for the journey. To that end we can rejoice if we have yielded and said yes when he calls us to sacrifice our pride for the sake of growth. That is one sacrifice you won’t hear about too often from pulpits. Perhaps it should be otherwise. However that itself is a form of yielding and I’m not sure some shepherds want to hear about it, let alone preach it.