DISTANCE

There’s sometime so consuming and satisfying when you experience some aspect of life on an intimate level. Just the intensity alone truly does affect a person.

And if you have had that kind of moment it is hard to suddenly have it end. It can leave such a hole in life.

I recall a few years ago when I was the care giver for my step father. It was more than about his needs.

We talked all the time and it was more involved than just running errands. And then that day came when had to go into a nursing home.

I knew the day would come and I was grateful for him that it didn’t end up part of his life for very long. He was so miserable there, but couldn’t live on his own and it was the only viable option.

And I can still recall that day when the doctor told me he could never go home. And that suddenly part of my life was over.

It was such a strange feeling that night as my wife and I drove down the freeway on our way to do some shopping. For the first time in years I was without that obligation.

I wouldn’t be returning home to the sight of my answer machine having a message from him. I wouldn’t be getting calls at different times of the day and night over needs.

There was a mixture for me. Blessings on one hand, but sadness too. Yet, in time other duties took that place.

It was another time that the Lord had placed a given cross on my shoulder. But it was never forever.

Yet after it was gone, after it no longer was a demand on my life there was a time of distance. And with all the things it summoned.

Still God does come into those moments. He will grant us grace and mercy in such times if we were truly faithful during the time of calling.

If not, we experience a different type of distance. One that can come with guilt. For wwe can feel the void in the times we should have helped, but didn’t.

It was all part of the process of life we must travel. Sometimes as a blessing others as a lesson.

And if we travel it for the right reasons, there will always be a joy that comes later. For that is the way the Lord touches.