THE GENTLE MAR

Being imperfect is a fact of life. But it doesn’t mean we accept it or enjoy when somebody else points out some flaw in our lives. I think the most natural reaction when criticized is for us to get defensive and instead of accept the comment find a fault to criticize in someone else.

The same behavior seems to apply to praise also. If we say something kind to another person they normally and I say normally will respond by doing the same to us.

I can’t speak for anyone else, but I enjoy being praise more than being criticized. And I have a feeling I’m not alone. I do wonder perhaps if that is part of the reason that the Apostle Paul mentioned in scripture about how we shouldn’t say anything to each other that wasn’t edifying. My paraphrased version of course.

The big question to me is how come when we all seem to feel that way we end up encountering more criticism than uplifting in life. And especially in church where we really probably need it even more because of the spiritual connection?

I suppose you could give any number of reasons for why this doesn’t happen. In part it reflects what I feel is the degree of unhappiness that people have as well as their own inability to truly forgive themselves for some mistake. So it ends with them relieving the stress and anger by venting it with unkind comments.

Can any church truly stop this cycle and become a real lighthouse of inspiration that only lifts up the saints? That might be the ideal, but it probably isn’t realistic.

What is realistic is to focus on doing what we can to change the cycle. To be kind and loving whenever possible. That can be a very difficult challenge when no matter how hard you try there are some people who will only give you grief for love.

Perhaps we can expect everyone to see their own flaws as god sees them or embrace the real inner healing that the Holy Spirit can work in one’s life. Maybe we can only in faith reach out with all our heart and soul and do what we can to let the Lord touch our lives.

Gentle is really the way we have to see the mar in our own lives if we are to taste of the greater warmth of knowing how it is covered by the blood of the lamb. It can be a lifelong process. I know I’ve only begun that journey myself. Oh I’ve been traveling it for years. But at a snail’s pace. Which is okay in some ways, because I have kept walking between the stumbling.

I’m sad for those who have never even started the journey. For no matter how they have wounded me I know that the hate they put on their own selves is much harsher than anything I could do to them. God of course awaits for us to wake up and see the greater truth. Some people just never open their eyes. I pray that we all will whenever possible. And rejoice that a mar can be a gentle touch instead of a hammer.