IN THE STILLNESS

A sun is burning in my mind and soul at the moment. Flares of anger and frustration are licking at my gut and boiling my otherwise tepid, stoic spirit with rage.

I hate people who lied too me more than once. They insult my intelligence and I know from scripture that Satan is their parent since he is the father of lies.

Yet I can’t always avoid such human beings. And this is a fact of life. There are some situations where God places us as part of our struggle of faith that we must be tested by dealing with those who are the devil’s implants of power.

That doesn’t mean one has to enjoy that reality. Merely that it is our choice and testing in terms of how we deal with it.

On a physical level the natural desire is to want revenge. And to be inclined to seek a way of causing harm to the person. The only problem is that God has said “vengeance I mine,” meaning it is part of his sovereignty to exact justice.

I have also come to understand that when the Lord does exact such justice he is so much better at knowing how to do so in a way that causes the person far more grief than I could. So my own slant on that aspect is if one really wants vengeance then let the Lord do it in a way that will really give the individual what they deserve.

Knowing this does not allow my spirit to alone dominate my flesh. Any spiritual awareness doesn’t prevent my moods and emotions from their maelstrom proclivity towards dreaming, wanting and praying for only negative consequences to the person who has harmed me.

What about forgiveness? Well for a person of my compulsive and proneness towards extremes sometime the made source of forgiveness comes from not trying to harm the person back. To let God’s spirit give me the strength to avoid that collision course with allow my desire for acting on my impulses control my decision.

It is in the aftermath often of when my emotions have cool that the stillness comes. Reason is restored and I have been surprised in the process how God will touch me during those precious times with a different kind of flame. It is one that abides with his light of understanding. A gift of grace that brings an insight, which enables me to see another facet to God I didn’t understand.

But it is hard at times to wait for that stillness. In my situation since I have learned how he has place me in the position to channel such light through words, I appreciate the “dialogue” of my experiences will never cease.

I only pray he grants me the peace and strength to wait upon the richness of his longsuffering stillness for the right answer instead of the one I would prefer when my flesh is doing the thinking. And I pray that as many as are able will also find that same stillness in their lives too.